


Our Fears

by anifreak48



Series: Possessive Uchihas and Where to Find Them. [2]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Blackmail, Itachi is Cute and Possessive, M/M, Manipulation, Possessive Behavior, Possessive Itachi and Shisui, Shisui Fucked up in the Past, Shisui is Repenting, Shisui is a Jerk, Shisui tries his best to protect Itachi's innocence, Underage tag is for Itachi who starts making romantic advances
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-31
Updated: 2020-06-16
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:34:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 4
Words: 27,039
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24477268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anifreak48/pseuds/anifreak48
Summary: If something happens once, you can never nullify the possibility of it happening again.Uchiha Itachi’s worst fear as a child was his loved one leaving him behind. Itachi falls for someone who already had abandoned him once.Uchiha Shisui’s worst fear was developing a weakness. He falls for someone who already became his Achilles heel once.
Relationships: Hatake Kakashi/Uchiha Obito, Uchiha Itachi/Uchiha Shisui
Series: Possessive Uchihas and Where to Find Them. [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1768003
Comments: 37
Kudos: 55





	1. Reality is Often Dissapointing

**Author's Note:**

> A story about an unconventional love. They were too many years apart to feel anything romantic for each other. 
> 
> I wanted to write a fic with older Shisui and younger Itachi. Therefore, the age of consent is a huge thing for this plot. I was searching for the legal age of consent in Japan. I shuddered when I saw what it is. I was trying my best not to add anything unhealthy other than their ‘Uchihaness’. Therefore, I changed the age of consent for my sanity. I don’t think I will be ok to see a 13 years old doing some sexual stuff with an adult.
> 
> I truly was enjoying writing this and will gradually update the fic. This is the fic, which had sidetracked me and has eaten my times up.

**Itachi’s POV**

People say, “Never meet your childhood idol, you will often be disappointed.”

I did not know about this saying when I wanted to meet him badly.

When I met him properly, I did not know how to react because how different he was from my expectations.

I did not know how to react when we started to interact with each other.

I did not know what to feel when he decided to leave the country.

I did not know how to deal with the fact that he had abandoned me.

However, when I finally met him after too many years, I knew for the first time what to do.

I knew for a fact that Uchiha Itachi will never let go of Uchiha Shisui again.

I was never a typical Uchiha kid, I never was strong, calm and stoic. I was really short, weak and emotional. I would always get tired from simple movements because of the frail nature of mine. I would always cry me eyes out if anything did not go in my way. I was an annoying crybaby. Even though I was adored by everybody from my family, once in a while I would catch other people saying how I was not worthy to be an Uchiha. How I could not be the heir of Uchiha Fugaku. How I should have been forgotten because of my apparent shortcomings.

Though my family was always there to support me, my young heart would get hurt because of those harsh words. My family had always been furious at people for making things harder for me. I still remember when my grandpa caught one of our distant relative bad mouthing about me. Grandpa simply cancelled every type of business deal with that family. When granny came to know about it, she went to their house and had a very strict conversation with them. She eventually confessed that she became a little violent and my mom had to practically restrain her so that she could not murder those people. Though I was too toung to understand the details, I knew how my family had made them suffer because of their opinion regarding me.

Albeit of their effort, I always had a fear that they will eventually abandon me because of how imperfect I was. It took them years of effort to convince me that I was never getting left alone. I was just perfect in their eyes as I was. Even though I was assured by my family on daily basis, my fear from those days had left scar inside my little heart. As a result I became really sensitive about my height and strength at a very early age. I used to make up for my insecurities over my fragile body with a fierce spirit. I was a joy ball who enthusiastically wanted to do everything that was allowed to do. I was known for my intense persistent nature when I wanted to persuade my goals. Everybody said I was just like my grandma, innocent looking fireball, who can cross mountains if it is required. 

I was really close to my grandparents when I was a child. It can be due to the fact that they spoiled their first born grandchild a lot. I would always follow them around like a lost puppy. Therefore, when they wanted to take a break from the city life, I decided to follow them into our village too. Four years old me felt like ‘I also have had enough of the polluted city and needed some fresh air' (I was known to copy my grandpa's words a lot) and wanted to leave the cursed city as soon as possible. 

My parents were not really thrilled about the idea of letting me have a vacation in that stage of my life but my tantrums were able to convince them otherwise. I was sad at the same time as I would have to leave my parents behind, so when they said they will visit me regularly, I became overjoyed. 

My grandparents had a deal with my parents, they will live in the village with me but I will have to come back to the city if they demand me to. After everything was set, we left for the village. My parents sent me off with tears in her eyes.

I was living the best period of my life in our village Konohagakure. My grandparents devoted themselves to the renovation of the Uchiha clan complex immediately after reaching the village. Meanwhile I joined the local elementary school and continued my study. I started to make many friends in the school. As I was originally from the city, my friend started to teach me things to turn me into a genuine Konoha member. I learned to climb trees, how to capture fishes in the river, how to capture beetles in the summer, how to jump from the top of the waterfall without hurting myself. I started to explore the mountain, the forest and the river bank that was around Konoha. 

My parents would visit us twice a month who would try to convince me that city life was better. They stopped doing so after a couple of times when they saw how happy I was to live in Konoha. My village activities, jumping and running around were helping my body to gain more strength. They took it as a positive side of letting their only child leave in Konoha. I was still a small and weak child compared to other people of my age, but in the village nobody really cared about it. I became the leader of the kid group because of my sheer enthusiasm to prank people. With time, I started to forget my worries about my physical appearance. 

Other Uchihas also would visit my grandparents regularly as they all had wanted to take a part in the clan complex renovation. Grandpa said that this complex would be used in future to hold Uchiha family getaways. I guess he wanted everyone to know the beauty of our root, the beautiful mighty Konohagakure.

That was how I was able to meet Obito oni chan when I was five years old. Whenever Obito ni chan visited with his parents, he would practically get bored when the adults were talking. I would take him for a tour around the village. I would impress him with my beetle capturing, tree climbing and fishing techniques; in exchange he would tell me the stories of his life, the adventures and about a person that I never met, Uchiha Shisui.

I guess Obito ni wanted to impress me with anecdotes of his activities in city life. As Shisui and he were inseparable, every story had a substantial part regarding Shisui .I got to know about everything like I was experiencing the same events with them.

When I first heard about Shisui, I did not know how much importance he will have to me in the future. Definitely, Shisui sounded awesome to me, but he was just as cool as Obito ni chan for the first few times. Gradually his awesomeness started to surpass Obito ni's in my eyes and started to get more and more curious about him. The curiosity eventually turned into obsession, of course no one was there to tell me about it.

The first thing I heard about him was, “Shisui is a devil with an angelic face. You know that he is the culprit but you can never prove it. He never leaves any evidence behind of what he does. Most of the times he tries to make the other Uchihas suffer.”

Obito ni always discussed Shisui in a manner that made me think that he himself was a fan of Shisui.

I replied, “He sounds dangerous Obito ni.”

And with that, it became Obito ni’s sole life goal to convince me of Shisui’s greatness, how he was actually a good person etc. “He is dangerous toward the people who make him mad, but he is really kind toward the rest of the people. In fact, I would say he is well respected inside the clan in spite of being such a young age because of his kindness (Obito ni was being deceived). Shisui is not an asshole-

“Bad word, I will tell granny you said that.”

“Sorry, I forgot that you are not a grown up. What I wanted to say is he is not horrible like other Uchihas.”

I deadpanned, “My family is not horrible.”

Obito ni became flustered, “Unghh, you know what I’m trying to say right? He is not horrible to good Uchihas like your family. Shisui is really kind, compassionate, intelligent, and he only messes with bad Uchihas to punish them. He also is my best friend who helps me out a lot.”

Shisui sounded interesting, “Can I meet him?”

Obito ni replied, “Of course you can. You are a cute chibi Uchiha, he will definitely adore you.”

Obito ni would further explain why Shisui was unique as an Uchiha. Shisui always sounded interesting to me. I founded his personality really fascinating. A person who can be devil and an angel depending on the situation. I have known that it is extremely difficult to make the Uchihas suffer and I was unaware of cases where one Uchiha will go after another one. It was like an unwritten pact, Uchihas stuck together throughout everything. So, when I heard that there was someone out there, deliberately targeting the Uchiha clan members, breaking the rule to cause them discomfort, he sounded like someone straight out of a manga. Gradually I developed an obsession over Shisui and I wanted to know about him badly.

Obito ni would go on and on about their stories. How they had started a prank war inside the school just because they were bored, how they have skipped copious amount of classes yet get away without being punished, how they locked their mean teacher in the gymnasium, how girls will literally fight each other to get Shisui’s attention (not an exaggeration), how they had beaten their opponent school in sports, how Shisui had made the strongest Uchihas cry etc. Young I wanted all sorts of details regarding those events. I wanted to know Shisui like Obito ni knows him. I wanted to grow up just like him; an intelligent athlete who is respected by the clan members and can sometimes be the bad boy when the situation demanded.

I came to understand later that Uchihas respected Shisui for complete different reasons. At first it was for how competent, kind, caring human being he was like his parents. In fact, Shisu’s family had always been known to be the ‘angel family’ and highly respected. Clan members were really proud of Shisui because they thought he will be the virtuous, righteous representative of new Uchiha generation. Their hope was pointless as one of the clan leader had eventually got the words of Shisui’s well concealed psychotic and manipulative side. He also discovered Shisui’s anomalous impulses to make the rest of the Uchihas suffer. There was huge investigation to find out his wrongdoings. All they could do was speculation of what Shisui had done but nobody could prove anything. At the end of their investigation fiasco, it became a common knowledge that Shisui goes after people even without any reason or motive, which scared everyone to say the least. 

To put it simply, Uchiha Shisui was truly a devil disguised as an angel. Since then the whole clan started to show respect to Shisui out of fear as nobody knew when he was going to target someone just because he needed some entertainment in his life. And no, Shisui was not selective about his targets, he had blackmailing materials over every clan member. He decided his victims randomly and he simply thrived on blackmailing the Uchihas.

My life was going really well in Konoha. I was looking forward to meet both Obito ni and Shisui. Few months passed, Obito ni again visited the village. Of course, he was excited to meet me. I took him to the river to catch some fish. Obito ni slipped on the bank and had fallen into the river. I was laughing too hard to help him out. He was too embarrassed to lose his footing like that. We came back with Obito ni full soaked in river water.

That night after the dinner I asked him, “Why does Shisui never visit the village?”

Obito ni grimaced, “Never call him just Shisui on his face, he doesn’t like it when people disrespect him. You will have to ask him why he doesn’t like to come here. I told him about the village, about how fun it is here.”

“What did he say?” I could not contain my joy.

Obito ni paled, “Ah, he was not interested.”

I did not know why, but it made me upset. As I used to wear my heart in my sleeve as a child, Obito ni was quick to catch on my sadness. He tried to cheer me up.

“Maybe you can tell him everything and convince him to visit. I will tell him you sent your regards chibi kun.” Obito ni assured me. I was looking forward to meeting with Shisui so that I can convince him to visit the villiage.

In the end, Shisu never came to the village; meanwhile I only had the opportunity to know about him from Obito ni. I was getting more and more information about Shisui; he truly sounded nice, kind, full of adventures and way too awesome in my mind. My young self was idolizing a person just from the stories alone even though nobody knew.

When I revisit those memories of mine and think how wrong I was about Shisui, I die from the cringe. I was truly seeing Shisui with Obito ni's eyes.

I came back to the city after two years. My parents wanted me to get serious about my studies. Therefore, as per our previous agreement, I was bound to come back. My grandparents stayed back in the village. For me, it was a heart wrenching experience as I could not even imagine leaving my friends, my memories in the village along with my grandparents. However, I decided to come back because my father said as soon as I do so, I will join some training routine under the supervision of Uchiha Shisui. 

When I heard about the news, I was ecstatic. I was thrumming out of excitement and could not wait more. My parents were able to reel me back in the city because my excitement to meet Shisui out weighed my desire to stay in the village. However, I did not know what Shisui would teach me.

I saw Shisui Uchiha for the first time in my life when I was only six years old. My first thought after seeing him was how ungodly cool looking he was. Uchihas are genetically handsome but Shisui was the most handsome Uchiha I have ever seen. When I thought Shisui could not get any more impressive, he was standing there to prove me wrong. Well, Obito ni did go on and on about how Shisui had a bunch of fangirls because of his cool outlooks. He was very different from a typical Uchiha on the surface. Somehow he looked very joyous and kind while he was discussing something with my father. Uchihas are stoic creatures who never are emotional in public. Shisui was an exception. I felt closer to him because of it, as I myself was extremely emotional too. He gave me the vive of a very polite person who has a beautiful smile on his face all the time. I always wanted to keep smiling like him. I just wanted to be like Shisui who lacks nothing when I grow up and I was absolutely sure that I would succeed. I really had an unhealthy amount of obsession about me turning into the next Shisui in future. Eventually I understood why it was a bad idea, but still it was something that I desired strongly. As usual, I had always been too determined to achieve my goals.

Later I came to know that Shisui was not discussing something happy, he was threatening my father with a kind smile on his face. 

After Shisui left, my father called for me and said, “Itachi, Shisui is a complex human being. Try to stay nice to him ok?”

That was confusing for me, because the Shisui I know is never a complicated person. I thought my father was wrong. I let him know my thoughts.

“I think Shisui is really cool, at least that is what Obito ni had said. He cannot be that bad.”

My father just smiled at me and said nothing to me. That night I overheard my parents’s conversation, which had altered my thinking pattern regarding Shisui. My dreamy state took the first hit when I found out how my first impression was way too off about him. I came to know that he was not kind, he was not someone who is well respected, he is extremely feared among the Uchihas because of his nature.

“What did Shisui want?” asked my mom.

“He doesn’t want to work with Itachi. That’s why he was here to blackmail me.”

“No wonder. He is terrible with kids. Of course he does not want to train Itachi. What did he say though?”

Father replied in a worried voice, “If we send Itachi, he will train Itachi to be just like him.”

My mother was apprehensive, “He won’t do that, will he?”

Father replied, “I don’t know. I will talk with Kagami and Haee so that they can stop Shisui from doing something drastic.”

I knew that they were Shisui’s parents. To be honest, I was a walking encyclopedia of information regarding Shisui because of Obito ni. I would always blame Obito ni for planting the seed of ‘Obsessing over Shisui’ in me.

After a long pause my mom asked, “Do you think this is a good idea to make him responsible for Itachi? He truly has the capability to turn Itachi into his miniature version. We are risking Itachi’s wellbeing here.”

“You know how sending Itachi is not our idea. The clan council decided to make Shisui the mentor for any of the Uchiha kids. Kagami requested it to be Itachi as he thinks our little boy will be a good influence on Shisui.”

“I still don’t understand why they will need a kid? Why can’t the grownups keep eyes on Shisui?” my mother grumpily asked.

“Shisui needs someone who won’t be a threat to him, who will occupy his free time and distract him without causing him any major problems, someone who will give Shisui a fresh start. As much as I hate the idea, I still agree with the Kagami that Itachi is the only Uchiha who is capable of doing so. Shisui will try his best to give Itachi a very nice impression of him just like he does with everyone else. And who knows? According to Obito, Itachi is really fond of Shisui. So, maybe our boy can save the clan from the next disaster.”

My mom bite out,“I know. I just hate Uchiha methods of dealing with problems. Just because they cannot control Shisui’s psychotic urge to manipulate their every action does not give them the right to involve our sweet boy in the mess.”

“If Shisui is not dealt with, he will cause chaos. You know how every single Uchiha hates him and is afraid of him. Think about it this way, Itachi is the last retort. Kagami begged me to let Shisui train Itachi.”

My mother was not happy, “Why don’t they just buy Shisui a pet? It will keep him busy.”

“I guess they decided on Itachi as a human will be more handful than a pet.”

“Shisui only irritates the mean Uchihas, they deserve it”, My mom was beyond angry.

My dad was appalled, “All Uchihas are mean.”

I did not have the heart to listen to more. The conversation left me confused, surprised and enraged. 

Why would Shisui even need me to distract him?

Why would Shisui not want to work with me? How could he not like me when Obito ni had already conveyed my regards to him?

My young psychology was searching for why someone can possibly hate me. However, unfortunately that line of thinking brought back my insecurities.

Was it because I am not strong?

Was it because I am short? 

After a long time, my physical imperfections again came back to haunt me. For the first time in my life, my feelings were hurt because of Shisui. The more I thought about the whole situation, the more I was convinced of my logic behind Shisui's reluctance to train me. I started to cry because of Uchiha Shisui without him knowing anything about it.

However, I still had hopes inside me. I hoped he would at least be the kind person that Obito ni had described. Positives thoughts regarding him were too strong to be removed from my heart.

The appointed day came quickly when I was supposed to formally meet Shisui. When I was dropped at the house of uncle Kagami, aunt Haee received me. She showed me the study room of Shisui and told me, “Think of it as your house. You can read books from the study room shelf. There is supposed to be a kid's book collection. Shisui will join you when he returns from school.”

I politely nodded, “Yes aunt.”

Aunt Haee ruffled my hair in reply, “You are so cute Itachi kun.” 

The whole female gender always found me cute. It was not news to me but I still blushed.

Even though I was not an Uchiha by appearance, I was one by my core. I already knew Shisui did not want me here. I decided to search for everything in the study so that I could find something that will make Shisui appear less cool. Of course, my childish logic is not supposed to be something worthy of battle strategy, but it sounded good back then. I was thinking if I can just make him appear less cool, eventually he would not care that much about my uncool nature.

First thing first; once aunt Haee left me in the study room, I started to go through every single thing. I wanted to find anything that I can hold against Shisui. Anything that will piss him off. I just hated him too much for not wanting to train me, in the same time I could not get over the admiration I had for him. It was really a tough situation for you Itachi. I was too absorbed in my searching venture to notice Shisui’s entrance.

“Who are you? And what are you doing in my study?”

I was startled, “I'm Uchiha Itachi, don’t sneak up on me like that. I got scared.”

My reply irritated him, “You freaking shrimp, I don’t care who you are. Did nobody tell you that it is rude to touch someone’s belongings without permission? What the hell are you doing here coming uninvited?” I saw him scowling at me.

_Obito ni never said Shisui was this much of a mean person. Where was the kind, joyous Shisui?_

I asked him in a dejected voice, “Don’t you know me?”

I thought he was familiar with my name from Obito ni and from my father.

Shisui replied with the most annoyed voice that had ever been directed at me by anyone, “Why would I know you?”

Several realizations hit me fast, He did not know me. I was nobody to him.

Shisui was not a nice person like I had always imagined.

His irritation said he will not adore me like Obito Ni said, moreover he did not appreciate my presence in his life. He was not the nice person I had been idolizing. He was the worst human being I knew. The illusion I had about Shisui was shattered into million pieces when I met him properly.

**Shisui’s POV**

I met a brat named Itachi when I was 15 and I started to question whether he was a gift from fate or a punishment from Karma for me because of the sufferings that I have caused to the Uchihas. That 6 years old brat had pushed my every button within 5 minutes of meeting me. I questioned the lady luck about why I was getting punished. Even after so many years, I do not understand whether he is a gift or a curse.

He irritated me, angered me and he was able to make me feel guilty at the end. It is really difficult to ignite the last emotion in me, I never feel guilty no matter how hideous my act is. I did not even feel guilty when I threw Obito, my best friend, whom I consider to be my brother under the bus to save my skin. I was not going to admit to my mother that I locked uncle Inabi in his office for one night; left him without any cell phone and organized some scary sounds to be played all night long. He was scared to death by the time his assistant got to him the next morning. I wanted some information on uncle Madara and he did not grant me the access. Though Obito took the fall for me like a good brother and I had to make up for it by treating him with lunches for 1 week, I never felt guilty for doing so. 

My father is the most unique Uchiha as he does not have those problematic Uchiha clan qualities. He is the first Uchiha to be born as a decent human being. He is considered to be the light in the darkness of the Uchiha clan. When I was born, everybody enthusiastically expected that I would be just like my father. 

But a huge disappointment to everyone, I turned out to be the worst member within our entire clan till these days. I guess the Uchihaness just skipped my father’s generation and made a full forced comeback in my personality.

I have always known that I was different from the other people. I liked to watch people suffer without any reason from a very young age. It was just too amusing to watch. I discovered that I also love to manipulate and blackmail people to see them burst into tears. 

The sadistic nature of mine was well hidden because I rarely interacted with my victims directly. They would cry, break and wale without knowing that I was the perpetrator behind their suffering. They were my minions who just made my life more interesting. I think I only had respect for three people- my parents and Obito. I never really considered anyone else to be a human being. 

I had been living a very happy life as I had the greatest gift an Uchiha can have, that is to scare other Uchihas. To say it without any thick sugarcoating, I had been considered to be the greatest manipulative and sadistic Uchiha known till date. It was really fun to mess with other Uchihas, who consider themselves to be higher living being. I was able to get under the skin of every single Uchiha; I have every blackmail worthy information on everyone from my clan. 

I went against the Uchihas from a very simple understanding, none of normal human beings are interesting enough to be worthy of my attention. It gave me the feeling of the god king who rules over small petty gods.

To be precise, I started the mission to pissing Uchihas off at a very early age. I think the fault was uncle Madara's; he was the one to train Obito and I when we were young about how to deal with our emotions. I do not know who on the earth came up with the idea of letting a megalomaniac teach kids of 8 years old. 

Well I cannot blame him fully as Obito turned out to be just fine by an Uchiha standard, except for his behavior around Kakashi. He was too deeply fallen for the guy to even properly function. He scared the hell out of Kakashi's friends and acquaintances when he thought about making Kakashi his.

I deny all types of assistance and advice I had provided Obito during his conquest. What other people do not know, cannot really hurt them. Everybody was deceived by my innocent face and I was happily terrorizing the Uchihas under the nose of my family. My newest obsession was to make Uchiha Madara suffer as he was considered to be the strongest Uchiha.

I had a very perfect son image in the mind of my parents. My victims, my sweet Uchihas were never brave enough to tell my parents anything about me. However, my mother became suspicious after the whole Kakashi incident and she started to keep her eyes on me. She was able to catch me red handed in action when I was snooping around to get some information to blackmail Madara. I was apprehended by my mom before I could cause any actual damage to Madara. She actually held a very long scolding session. It was both hilarious and sad for me as she was torn between whether to show her anger as what I was doing was wrong or to show her appreciation as I was fucking with every arrogant Uchihas she knows.

“You are not supposed to find some dirt on people and blackmail them.”

I replied, “ But mom I successfully made half of the Uchihas cry by doing so.”

Her face lit up, “Really!!! That’s really a great achievement. I’m proud of you.”

“I wanna make you prouder mom.” 

“Wait, that’s not the point. The length you go to control the Uchihas, the time you invest behind them, is not healthy Shisui.”

I tried to state, “Mom, Uchihas never do anything healthy.”

My mom stopped me, “You are obsessed with making them suffer. It makes me really proud that you were able to pull this whole thing off, but this passion of yours to make someone suffer needs to go away. You are not some random Uchiha. You are the sole heir of Kagami and Haee Uchiha. I will not tolerate this sort of behavior from you.”

Somehow Madara got the words about my snooping around for his dirt. He became active to prevent me as he knew about my previous successes. As the head of clan council, he called for a clan meeting just to stop me from doing further damage. Of course, they could prove nothing. However, uncle Madara still wanted to keep me in check so that I do not turn into the biggest threat in his life like he was speculating.

And just like that, that incident brought the bane of my existence to me. A little runt named Uchiha Itachi. This little piece of shit went out of his way to make my life hell since day one. There had always been a palpable animosity between us since the moment we met. Our relationship developed from there and eventually we came to like each other; but I would always say Itachi was the first Uchiha ever who had intrigued me and made me believe, he can be my equal if taught properly.

Maybe I should start saying how I met him. Entire Uchiha clan thought I needed to invest my fascination to manipulate other people on something different. They thought I could spare the time to train one of the Uchiha brat (yah, I question their sanity too). I hated kids; moreover an Uchiha offspring, god knows how entitled it would act.

I went out of my way to get some blackmailing materials on uncle Fugaku when I knew he agreed to lend his son for my well being! I got something and threatened him with that. I even said I will make a miniature version of me out of his son. I was sure that he would refrain from sending the small Uchiha to my house; after all, I never failed to achieve my goals. Also, my threats were something everyone knew not to take lightly.

One day I came back from my school to find a kid going through my stuff in my study room. He was a very young looking Uchiha kid who was diving inside my drawers where I used to keep all sensitive information. The kid somehow picked the locks. In my opinion, that was an extremely rude thing to do. 

“Who are you?”

“I'm Uchiha Itachi.”

_Who is that? Do I know it?_

The kid continued, “Don’t sneak up on me like that. I got scared.”

_You damn brat. You are doing something wrong and now you are trying to scold me for scaring you!_

“You freaking shrimp, did nobody tell you that it is rude to touch someone’s belongings without permission?” I was extremely irritated at the whole situation and did not hold back myself from taking it out on him. 

The short boy's face was contorted with hurt, which did not make sense to me. My words were harsh, but not harsh enough to make someone look like I have killed their puppy.

“Aunt said to consider it my home too. That’s why I was going through the stuff. Technically I have permission.” The brat replied with a timid voice. I could say he was trying to hold his ground against me, he was miserably failing.

The voice made my anger flare, I never liked weaklings, “I don’t like when a weakling like you touches anything without my permission.”

The whole situation was bizarre. No matter what, I had always known for being calm and collected. Nobody other than my family member could ignite emotional responses from me. However, Itachi did that without even trying hard. My explanation for the incident was I was extremely irritated at him because of the violation of my privacy. Later I found out, I forgot to lock my drawers, he did not pick the locks. I always felt bad for snapping at Itachi that much. Technically he did nothing wrong, but I was thinking the exact opposite back then.

My statement of dislike toward him somehow made the kid react in a weird way. At first I felt like he was going to cry because the feeling of hurt was more prominent in his features. The kid rubbed his eyes a few times and tried to school his facial expression into apathy only to fail. Just when I thought he would burst out into tears, the runt replied sarcastically, “Really? You don’t like it? I had no idea. I wouldn’t have noticed without you saying anything.”

His sarcasm was ringing in my ear. He was making me angry and I did not know why but I felt like he was antagonizing me. How a small, cute, little puppy can be just a shit, I had no idea.

I understood I was acting completely out of my character. Thinking about giving us a whole new start, I said politely, “Let’s not fight. I’m Shisui.”

“I know”, Itachi replied with one brow lifted. 

_Damn this Uchiha brat. I am never good at dealing with kids. I should do something to make him happy. Maybe if I throw compliments at him, it will make the situation better and he will be less difficult?_

“A small chibi like you is showing interest in my book collection. That is a huge thing brat.”

It seemed to piss off the kid more. His quivering self was gone and he was angry, "Do you have a death wish bastard? Don’t call me small and chibi Shisui.”

I was taken aback, such an uncouth word for an Uchiha child. Also, he had the audacity to call me just by my name. The kid was showing no respect. I was beyond enraged, “Where is your manners brat? Call me ni chan.”

“Like hell I will call you that. Earn that title. I had to leave my village and friends so that you cannot mess with other people. You think you have my respect? Why? You are just as dumb as you look.”

“What did you just say!!!!! I’m not dumb and I do not look DUMB. YOU LITTLE PIECE OF SHIT”, my vein was ticking.

The kid jumped on the table, grabbed my collars and then headbutted me, “I’m not going to waste my time to learn something from you. You are a horrible person.”

“That hurts you little shit.”

I was touching my forehead. I was too taken aback by his action. No, that is an understatement, I was completely dumbfounded by Itachi. Uchihas never engage in physical violence. He however, was an exception. I did not know if he was dauntless or stupid to hurt me. Itachi's blatant anger toward me was not making any sense but I at least understood that he was the kid I was supposed to train up.

_So the brat hates teachers in general? Or he just hates me? What is his reason? Damn Uchiha Fugaku. That man has a nerve of steel. I threatened him, yet he sent his spawn to cause troubles in my life._

I never had the opportunity to socialize with the youngest Uchiha toddlers. That was the reason I did not know anything about Itachi. I could have prepared myself better if I had known what was coming my way.

The runt had the impudence to bite back, “Yah that was my goal when I hit you. Why? Did you think I was doing that as a sign of my adoration toward you?” 

I never was violent, but all I wanted to do was throw the brat out of my study through the window. His words were able to completely piss me off. However, I talked myself out of doing anything drastic and just shouted at him, “Get out of my study, now.”

And out of the blue he bowed in the most formal manner and said in a guilty voice, “I’m extremely sorry, I didn’t know that I was not supposed to touch anything in this room.

_Why is this little shit showing some sudden respect? Is he finally understanding how bad it is to piss Shisui Uchiha? Hah, take it brat._

I was feeling a sense of petty victory, which did not make me proud. I started to laugh out of satisfaction, which was interrupted immediately. 

“Shisui, be nice to him. You are way too old to fight against a nice kid like Itachi kun.” My mom chastised me.

That brat apologized because he saw my mother entering the room. He played me, the mighty Shisui Uchiha, who was well known for causing discomfort to other people. For the first time in my life, I was surprised by the action of an Uchiha. To simply put, Itachi had triggered irritation, anger, surprise, pettiness and guiltiness in me within 5 minutes of meeting me. I did not even know that I could show so many emotions in front of a stranger within a whole month.

That moment of our first interaction was the first of my many defeats to Itachi.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is explained from Shisui’s point of view on how his relationship was with Itachi.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the new chapter of our fears. It did not take me that long to organize this chapter as it was almost written. I just had to add some new paragraphs. Hope you guys enjoy it.

_Inner thoughts._  
ALL CAPITALS ARE FOR INDICATING FRANTIC STATE.

**Shisui’s POV**

My mom chastised me, “Shisui, be nice to him. You are way too old to fight against a nice kid like Itachi kun.”

_Ahhh, so that’s why the brat became a perfectly polite human being._ _This manipulative brat seems rather interesting. I guess it will be more entertaining in the future to observe how this kid turns out._

My mom pulled me out of my inner thoughts, “You will take over Itachi kun's training.”

“Can I not do it? Can you at least change the kid? I don’t want this one”, I complained like a petulant child. I did not want that devil around me.

“No. You know why clan council decided that you need to spend some quality time doing something nice as a punishment for all of your previous wrongdoings.”

I retorted back out of frustration, “Nobody can prove anything.”

“Doesn’t mean you didn’t do it sweetie.” My mom sweetly reminded me.

“I can do all the chores, I can even clean the whole house everyday as the punishment if you want, but not train this brat. I already hate him. He is a lying little shit. Also, how old is he? Three? Why would someone want me to corrupt such a young soul?”

Itachi decided to interrupt, “I’m not three, I’m six years old.”

I retaliated out of infuriation, “Really!! Why are you so tiny and short then? Also, did anybody never teach you to not interrupt someone when they are talking?” Itachi definitely was getting on my nerves without even trying hard.

After hearing my words, Itachis’s eyes started to fill with tears. The kid ran out of the study while rubbing his eyes furiously. 

_That little shit, acting like he is hurt because of my words in front of my mother. I did not even insult him this time!_

I did not feel the necessity to keep my thoughts hidden, “Oh my god, Did you see mom? This brat is so manipulative! He is pretending to cry because you are here. Can you believe-”

My mom cut me off at mid sentence.

“Shisui” my mom's voice was ice cold, which was enough to make me uneasy.

She was angry, “Why on earth would you do that? His height is a very sensitive topic for him.” 

I protested, “Mom, he is faking it.”

“Itachi kun is difficult toward everyone new he meets. You have to earn his respect; Instead of doing so, you just made him cry.”

“That little shit is beneath me. Yet you want me to earn his respect!!!!!”

“Yes.”

“That was a rhetorical question. No, I don’t want to babysit an Uchiha, I would rather destroy them.”

“And that’s why you will get the responsibility of Itachi kun. Your obsession to destroy every Uchiha so that you can see them cowering at your feet is somewhat nice to hear but not a very nice behavior. Consider it to be a community service for the criminal activities you have conducted.”

“Mom”, I was whining. 

“Now go apologize to him and always remember to be nice to him.”

“What makes you think I am a good idea? Last thing you know, I have trained him as my protégé. I can turn into a sociopath like me.”

“You won’t do it.”

I was happy to know that I still had my mom’s trust, “You trust me not to sabotage Itachi’s innocent mind!!”

She replied bluntly, “No, that’s an order. Don’t try to mess with his head.”

“I don’t want to be saddled with babysitting tasks.” I was sounding more and more like a toddler.

“You are not the one who is doing any task here, It’s Itachi kun.”

“What?”

“He will help to hog the majority of your time so that you can't play your little mind games with the rest of the Uchihas.”

That was Uchiha's method of thinking, which they thought would help me anchor to my humanity. “I can date a girl to divert my passion.”

“You change your partners quicker than you change your T shirt.” My mom did not sound pleased. 

“Don’t you have another option?” 

“Yes.”

“That is?”

“Remember the girl from the Danzo family, we were seriously thinking about marrying you off with her.”

“WHAT? NO, I’LL TRAIN ITACHI KUN.” I had an enormous hatred for Danzo and my family knows it. 

_So they would threaten to form a marital bond with Danzo's family to make me cave in? Sometimes I forget about my mom’s ability to play dirty. If they were thinking about going that far to stop me, maybe I should play along. Lay low for a bit. Then strike when nobody is expecting me to act._

“Glad we are on the same page. Now find Itachi kun and try to cheer him up.”

I reluctantly started to leave to find out where Itachi had run off to. “I heard from Obito that he likes you a lot.”

I turned back with a surprise on my face, “What do you mean? He doesn’t even know me!”

“You will have to ask him Shisui kun.”

“Ok fine, don’t tell me. I will find it out from him.”

I was searching for Itachi and was not really successful at that. After roaming around a while, I went outside of our house. I found him sitting on the favorite spot of my mom, the backyard near the pond. I wanted to start everything anew.

I asked him politely, “Can I sit down?”

The kid’s eyes were red and puffy, “No, I don’t want to talk with mean Shisui.”

_Can I kill this rude brat? How can someone annoy me so much within such a short time?_

I tried to be the civil one, “You know, I never felt guilty for anything I ever did, which entails so many things that you will be surprised to know. However, I feel extremely bad for making you cry.”

Itachi had a cute frown on his face, “Why?”

“I have no idea. I know that I’m not going to train you because I like to. Trust me it’s more of a punishment than a privilege. Then again, I never do anything that I truly hate. So, maybe I came to like you within our short interaction.”

The kid tried his best to wipe his tears, “I insulted you, there is no way for you to like me. You hate people who don't respect you.”

“Who told you that?” I was surprised to know that he was disrespecting me even after knowing that it would displease me.

_You are a truly interesting person, Itachi kun._

That was the 2nd time when Itachi was able to intrigue my interest.

Itachi replied to my question, “Obito ni.”

_Mom also said he knows Obito. Why would Obito talk about me to this kid?_

“So, tell me, why do you want to train me?”

I ruffled his hair; they felt like feathers under my hand. “I don’t know brat. I was being mean to you, that’s why you retaliated. Let’s forget what happened and start anew.”

He replied without certainty, “Ok.”

“Let’s go back inside. Shall we?”

“Yes, Shisui.”

I was starting to get irritated again, “Can you please call me big brother? It makes me uncomfortable when you call me by my name.”

“I don’t feel like calling you brother.” Itachi pouted.

_God this little chibi is lucky that he is way too cute, or else I could have really given him a proper piece of my mind._

I said in an annoyed voice, “It is not like I’m going to teach you from the good will of my heart or because I adore you. At least show some respect brat.”

The brat answered with a wide smile, “You said you already like me, so that doesn’t matter anymore.”

My vein popped on my forehead, “You are a little shit, do you know?”

“Only you say that. Everybody else adores me. Maybe you are the shit, Shisui.”

_Maybe I can throw him inside the pond? Mom would be mad for sure but I’m willing to face her wrath._

I decided not to do that, because I was swayed by his innocent smile. I had no idea how I was supposed to deal with that small, cute devil. I tried not to lose my cool in front of him from his snarky remarks. That was how it started, the tale of how the unbeatable Shisui was defeated by a little, oblivious, cute demon.

Itachi and I started to spend time together routinely from that day on. However, I was sure that Itachi hated me to his core; the feeling was mutual up to a certain degree. None of us can call our relationship to be amicable. Surprisingly, we got along with each other pretty well. Even though our initial interaction was not something I was proud of, Itachi seemed to be a nice kid. He was not an entitled, little, brat that I predicted him to be. 

With the increasing time; I started to see Itachi’s change of behavior toward me. At first he started with scooting over to me little by little when we sat down for study. Then he stopped the random insults that he was sprouting spontaneously. Before I noticed, I found myself looking forward to spending my time with him. It became a regular ritual of ours. He would sit with me in my study; we would slip into doing our own stuff. I started to learn about his likes and dislikes. 

Apparently, he did not like it when people underestimate him because of his small physique. 

_So that is what ticked you off initially when I commented on your height._

He loved to talk about his family, the village, and his friends back there.

_No wonder he hated the idea of leaving them._

I started to tell him about the good and ‘suitable for children’ achievements of mine. However, he already knew them all through Obito. As I talked with him, I could feel strong adoration for me oozing from him.

We would discuss Uchiha methods of dealing with life and problems. He would ask me questions, I would try my best to reply. 

One day Itachi sadly said, “I always thought you were a cool guy, until you refused to work with me. I always wanted to be like you. Then I started to hate you because of how you interacted with me. Now I don’t know any more if I should hate you or like you.”

I did not like how his sadness was touching my heart, “I’m sorry for that Itachi kun. I will try to make everything better so that you don’t have to hate me.” 

I could not believe my ears. I was continuously apologizing to Itachi about what I did. Worst thing was I could not even get mad at him as the kid was truly hurt and he was not trying to remind me of my behavior intentionally.

_He is unknowingly triggering emotional turmoil in me. Just think what he will be capable of doing once trained accordingly. You would make an exceptional Uchiha if I can train you in my way, Itachi kun._

I wanted to turn him into an exceptional Uchiha, who will be able to kill everyone with his devilish acts. But I could never make myself teach him that as I did not have the heart to corrupt such an innocent, sweet person.

Time started to fly. It was our 3rd month of working together. We were at my study as appointed.

“What will we discuss today Shisui?” Itachi asked.

“Stupid flaws and how to deal with them. Every Uchiha inherits some characteristics that come as a package deal with our genes.”

“But I thought you don’t have a flaw. A few days earlier Obito ni said that’s why everyone hates you.”

“You are correct on unanimous hatred toward me but it is not because I’m flawless. It’s because my flaws are stronger than others.” I started to talk with Itachi about different things one after another. When I was done explaining the whole possessiveness, I asked him, “What are you possessive of?”

“My family members. I don’t want to share them with someone else. What is it for you?”

I replied with a smile,“I’m not going to tell you.”

“That’s not fair Shisui”, he pouted.

I started to chuckle, “Uchiha’s never play fair. Oh, I have an idea. How about you find out what am I possessive of? If you can do that, you will graduate immediately from my school.”

He pleaded, “Please tell me.”

I denied him an answer, “Nope brat.”

“Is it your family?”

“I’m ok with sharing their love with someone else. I didn’t kill you for snatching my mom’s affection, did I? ”

He whined, “Shisui.”

“Show me respect you little imp.”

“Are you deaf? I told you to earn it. I’m not seeing any kind of attempt from you.”

I sighed out of frustration, “Just when I feel like we are making some progress, you throw insults at me Itachi kun.”

“You always start it.”

I could not deny his accusation. I bite back a reply like a child, “If you don’t respect me, I will always call you bratty Itachi.”

Itachi's cute frown made me want to laugh, “Shisui, don’t call me that.”

“Will do. Bratty Itachi. Wait, that's too long. BrattyTachi, how does it sound?”

“Why would you call me? It’s so mean”, Itachi looked like he would burst into tears, which made me panic.

“Ung…. don't cry. Rather than calling you by such an awful name, I will call you Tachi. It’s an endearment brat. So, don’t you dare to shed tears over this one.”

Itachi happily replied, “Hai, Shisui.”

Even though I decided to make an endearing nickname, the brat was still calling me Shisui. 

_Maybe it was his own way of showing that he is fond of me?_

That was what I wanted to believe.

Itachi stopped my inner thinking by saying, “You said everyone hates you because of how extreame your Uchiha traits are. That means you are extremely possessive of the things you consider yours. I will find out what you are possessive of. I will find out what you are possessive of.”

I was laughing so hard when Itachi was stating his opinion. I knew the answer to his question and he definitely would be surprised when he learns the truth, “Deal. If you can find it, I will grant you any wish you make.”

Itachi beamed at me.

Itachi was taking too much of my time for my comfort; it was making me unable to find enough time to do any plotting that can make other Uchihas miserable but I was not complaining about it. I still worked to find subtle ways to blackmail uncle Madara without my family noticing anything unusual. I wished to take over my father's position as soon as I finish my studies. I thought having some blackmailing material on Madara will help me to get his support after I take over and also make me be able to control his actions. 

Meanwhile Itachi would read some books to keep himself busy, draw pictures or study for his school. The kid had a very good academic result. Sometimes Itachi would ask me about what I was doing. I would explain something irrelevant to him. For some reason, I wanted to preserve his innocence. The days were going on without a hitch while we followed our comfortable routine. 

Itachi truly became my anchor for me as I started to lose my desire to spend time skimming to get back at other Uchihas. Instead I found myself talking with Itachi about trivial things a lot. The kid wormed his way into my heart. I started to consider him as a family member within a few months of our arrangement. The problem was, I did not even notice it when these things happened.

One reason for that could be that I never faltered from my biggest goal. Making my mentor Madara cry. Therefore, the rest of the changes because of Itachi went completely unnoticed by me.

Eventually I got what I wanted to use against uncle Madara. It was difficult to gather what I wanted to use as a weapon against him, but it was worth it to the last bit. I requested to meet uncle Madara, he agreed without giving it much thought. After all, I was his disciple. 

I ran a simulation meeting with Madara in my brain. I found out how he can turn the table against me and get the upper hand. I prepared accordingly so that he could not find any Achilles heel of mine to exploit me. 

To be honest, I never had any weakness. No, it was rather I was too careful not to develop any kind of weakness, which can be utilized against me. I was able to torment numerous Uchihas because I was able to find out cracks in their defense. Almost in 99% cases, weakness was directly associated with the people those Uchihas cared for. 

The people I cared most about were my parents and Obito. My parents never had done anything blackmail worthy in their whole lives. Meanwhile, no one can prove my involvement in anything questionable. Therefore, the only way to blackmail me was through Obito as he was the only person outside of my family I cared about. I always consider him my brother. However, the afraid, Uchiha cowards always thought that I was cold hearted enough to get rid of Obito if it was necessary. Obito already knew about my familial feelings and protectiveness toward him. Therefore, I never went out of my way to correct the Uchihas as their misconception was working in my favour. He himself was another formidable force with whom someone should not mess with. That was another reason why Obito was never a threat.

When everything was considered, nobody could make me beg by targeting my closest ones. I had always been careful not to let anyone get too close to me, which might lead me to care about them. I would rather die than be exploited by someone just because someone has found something to threaten me.

My nightmares mostly were about someone defeating me because they got something against me to make me lose. I abhorred defeats. Therefore, my biggest fear as an Uchiha had always been the possibility of developing a weakness

I always felt thankful to Madara after that specific meeting of that day. Because he made me realize a fact, which I was unable to notice.

When we met him at his home office, I straight away demanded from him, “Give me your support when I take over my father’s position.”

He was amused to say the least, “You really like to skim ahead of times. It’s at least 5 more years too early before you could join the company. I have to say that I expected nothing less from you. Anyway, what makes you think you can demand Uchiha Madara to be on your side? Grovel on my feet, you skimming devil.”

I could see his menacing grin.

_That’s why I love him so much. He can hold his ground against me. He is a difficult opponent._

I said kindly, “You have two choices; number 1- you willingly support me, number 2- You support me against your wish. If you don’t choose the 1st one, I will make you lose the person you hold most dear to yourself. It won’t take much effort as I already know you, uncle Madara.”

I put extra kindness in my voice as I knew, that was the clam moment before the thunderstorm that was coming next. As expected, all colours left uncle Madara’s face.

_Bingo_

Madara shuttered, “Where did you hear that?”

_One statement has reduced you to shuttering? What more can I do to you today?_

My inner self was laughing out of delight.

“I have done my research and found out about your little chat with Uzumaki Mito.” His rigid posture is saying that I managed to hit him where it would hurt the most.

He stiffly replied, “You can’t prove anything.”

_Yes I can. Shisui never goes after his prey without a full proof plan._

I replied in a gentle voice, “I don’t need to prove anything; all I have to do is go to Uncle Hashirama and tell him in detail about my new obtained -

I was stopped by a panicked uncle Madara, “He knows me too well, he knows about everything I did. He accepted me with all of my flaws. What makes you think he doesn’t know about Mito?”

I could clearly see uncle Madara was losing control with passing moments. To an outsider, he would look the same; but I have known him for a long time and I could see that he was frightened.

_Love truly makes you weak._

“Well I never thought you would hide it from uncle Hashirama, but your reaction confirms that you never told him. What will happen when I tell him what you did to his first love?”

Uncle Madara actually did not do anything grave to Mito. He threatened her a little by using the exact sentences I said initially, made sure to inform her parents about her affection toward Hashirama, which caused an uproar. He fabricated evidence to make Hashirama believe she was dating multiple persons simultaneously. So when uncle Hashirama was heartbroken by his 1st love's blatant cheating, Madara played the role of the best friend; he consoled heartbroken Hashirama. That was how their relationship started. Uncle Madara had erased all types of evidence regarding his involvement in Hashirama's breakup; I had to dig really deep to find that information. 

_Even though you did nothing major wrong, thinking about losing Hashirasma is pushing you toward your edge. That’s exactly why I’m thankful that I have no such partner._

“I taught you meticulously, there are boundaries that even Uchihas don’t dare to cross. You are crossing the most forbidden one.” Madara's voice was shaking. I was amused as it was because of his fear of losing his husband. Uncle Hashirama was well aware of his husband’s tendency to control and manipulate other people’s actions. He would never leave Madara, yet Madara was at the end of his wits because of his fear to lose Hashirama.

_I scared you so much that you are trying to make me remember the Uchiha rule book. I never thought it would be this easy to make you break._

“It’s really sweet how you think I won’t abandon the questionable Uchiha morals if it’s required to achieve my goals. I feel like you don’t even know me uncle. You wound me”, I replied with a sadistic smirk decorating my lips.

“You are not supposed to target the family Shisui. You know what? He won’t believe you.” Uncle Madara spitted out through his clenched teeth. 

_Ahhhhhhhhh, I’m so close to my victory. Uchiha Madara will be my puppet for the rest of his life._

“Maybe he will just laugh it off. Maybe he will admonish you a little bit as I know how much he loves you. Maybe he will get mad at you, even worse; maybe he will leave you for good. Question is, are you willing to risk it?” I replied while the devilish smirk did not leave my face. That statement was able to throw Madara in a loop.

He had stood up and grabbed the edges of his study table and gritted, “He has seen much worse from me throughout our relationship. NOTHING WILL BE ABLE TO TAKE HIM AWAY FROM ME, HE IS MINE.” 

With that sentence uncle Madara lost his composure, I was looking at a red eyed Uchiha Madara who was shaking from anger.

_And that’s how I won against the great Madara._

I started to crackle, “As I thought, I can make you bleed if I attack with the information regarding uncle Hashirama .”

“I will support you in the future. In return you will forget about the whole thing and you will never try to go against me with this information.” There was panic and urgency in Madara’s voice, which made me purr.

I sighed happily, “You should actually beg, then I will consider it.”

He acquiesced immediately, “Please Shisui, don’t do it. Don’t tell him. I can’t lose him.” 

I made Madara beg because he was too frightened to lose his husband. “Eww, I’m not getting a lover in the future. I don’t want to be controlled because my partner has become my weakness.”

Madara ignored my disgust and said, “Do we have a deal you freaking devil?”

I almost sang, “I made you beg uncle. Show some respect toward this mighty Shisui sama.” A mocking smirk was on my face.

He ignored my insolence, and pleaded again, “Shisui please, promise me. Please don’t tell Hashirama.” 

His voice was an absolute wreck toward the end. Of course, his suffering was feeding my ego more and decided to act cockier. “Beg properly, uncle. Grovel, then I will consider it”, I said while my malicious smile never left me.

Then the unthinkable happened, uncle Madara arranged him in the proper apology stance and begged, “Please, don’t tell him. I can lose everything, but not my husband. I will give you anything you want. So please, don’t make him hate me.”

I felt like I was the most superior human being at that moment, “Oh I promise. I will never go after Hashirama uncle if you promised to support me.”

Madara replied, “I agree.”

“Now we have a deal, uncle. Try not to cry much. After all, you never were a good match against me. I'm supposed to be the greatest Uchiha. Not you, Madara.”

And then it happened, Madara snapped again because there is a limit upto which someone can tolerate obnoxious cockiness. 

Madara darkly declared out of irritation, “I will not let you have the satisfaction of defeating me Shisui. You don’t have someone like Hashirama by your side, but you still have your family. What makes you think I won’t go after your family to get my revenge?”

I smiled, “My parents are the two nicest human beings in the world. You can never find any dirt on them and as you know, they already are well informed about my controversial morality. Therefore, threatening to reveal my truth to them won't work either. You won’t be able to blackmail them or me using your lame methods. As for Obito, you will spare him because he was your precious disciple. You will get nothing from targeting my family.”

He smiled like a maniac, “Aren’t you leaving someone out?”

I politely started to rub salt in his wounds with the kindest smile I could muster, “Leaving someone out? Have you gone nuts? I have no such one. Losing to me has already messed up with your brain. How the heck were you not overthrown before by anyone?” My smile could be considered empathetic while I was actually mocking him with my smile.

_It's so fun to fuck with him. The loss is leading him toward wrong assumptions. He thinks I have someone else important enough to be his target. He was the one to teach me not to keep any weakness around me. Yet he was the one with a weak foot. Now he is just uttering some nonsense regarding me caring about someone else. How stupid is he?_

I was thinking in details, how me getting the upper hand against him had thrown uncle Madara in a loop, which was making him say something laughable like he could make me cry through someone else. 

_Uchiha Shisui has no weakness dear Uncle._

Uncle Madara then decided to drop the bomb,“What about the Fugaku kid that you are training? 

_What? What does Itachi have to do with anything!_

His threat continued, “What if I go after him?”

_What did this fucking bastard say!_

_“_ We have thrown the kid at you so that we can control the rabid dog that you have become. It would be so fun to target a defenseless tiny Uchiha brat. It would be a glorious victory when I break him. I will-” 

I hated the triumphed look on Madara’s eyes. Before I could properly fathom his implication to cause Itachi any kind of harm, I bit out, “I WILL SLAUGHTER YOU AND CHOP YOUR BODY INTO THOUSAND PIECES. I WILL LEAVE THOSE PIECES IN THE ROADS TO BE FEASTED ON BY STRAY DOGS IF YOU DARE TO LIFT A SINGLE FINGER AGAINST MY ITACHI.” 

_What is wrong with me?_

_Why did I snap at him like that?_

_Have I ever threatened to murder someone so gruesomely?_

_Have I ever lost control over my emotions to such extent?_

_No, Uchiha Shisui was always known for keeping his cool even in the most devastating situation._

_Then why now?_

Madara’s insane laughter filled the room, “Got you on the weak foot at my first try. You are so protective of him after a couple of months that you are flashing red eyes at me, Shisui.”

_Red eye?_

_Why do I have it!_

_I have never gotten any red eyed incidence ever!_

_Why does it appear now?_

_Why over Itachi?_

Madara continued, “I look forward to what happens with years of interaction between you two.”

I tried to get my emotions under control, “I only am protective of the kid because he is too small to protect himself.” 

_Right?_

_What else could be the reason? This is protectiveness, not possessiveness. Right?_

Madara replied with a menacing smile, “Is that what you kids call possessiveness nowadays? Tsk, you young people are not honest toward your feelings.”

I vehemently protested, “I'm not possessive of him.”

“Of course, your red eyes just makes your argument more believable”, his sarcastic voice was drilling into my head.

I knew that I was defeated by him because of Itachi. Even though my initial goal was achieved, I made him beg and promise me for future support. However, he just turned the situation completely upside down.

_I should leave, fighting with Madara will get me nowhere._

I replied, “Let’s just keep our threats to ourselves and support each other to achieve our goals. I will not cause any troubles to you.”

Madara kept on laughing, “Nice way to dodge the subject. I agree to help you out as long as you stay away from my Hashirama. And if you decide to go after him, I will go after your Itachi.”

I had no control over my emotions, “He is a kid for fucks sake. Are you out of your fucking mind you rotten bastard. Stay away from m- him.”

I almost said my Itachi again.

He replied, “Stop throwing vulgar insults, Shisui. You are not acting like an Uchiha because I decided to threaten that little disciple of yours.”

I sarcastically retorted back, “You are acting really perfect when I threatened you. You flipped your lead when you thought you would lose Hashirama.”

Uncle Madara retorted back like a petulant child, “He is very important to me. He is my husband, of course I panicked.”

I replied, “Same here, I panicked because –

_Because, Itachi is important._

_Because, Itachi is a kid who does not know how to protect himself._

_That’s why I’m being protective, right?_

I stopped without finishing my statement.

Uncle Madara took the opportunity to mock me more, “You panicked, because he is your future husband? I never knew there is any marriage proposal discussed between your houses. I guess Fugaku and Kagami forgot to inform me last time we met for playing Shogi.”

I shouted, “What the fuck is wrong with you? He is a little kid! Shut the fuck up you perverted, dirty, old fart. Leave him alone.”

I was shaking out of anger because of his implications. It was not unheard of to discuss marriage proposals between two families for young Uchiha heirs. It’s not unusual to have an age gap too as there were many families who would disgustingly sacrifice their younglings if it meant they could be on the good sides of Uchihas. They would arrange the marriage of their children without considering the child’s opinion. The children, who are forced to be engaged in Uchiha families at young ages, cannot really say anything against this heinous act as the law permits the parents to do so. As a clan with questionable morals, taking a way too young partner is not unheard among Uchihas. However, to imply I have such an intention toward my sweet Itachi made me want to kill him at that moment, at that exact place. Even though he was just trying to mess up with me, it still was unforgivable. 

Madara kept on laughing like a lunatic and said, “I agree to leave him alone once you promise me not to go against my husband you little scheming shit.”

I immediately promised, “Deal.”

I practically ran away from Madara. I had speculated my many flaws, which can be a weakness to me; but I never considered that Itachi himself was my ultimate weakness who was truly a threat in my life.

When I came back to my house, I started to run the previous event in my mind. I was absolutely sure that Madara would not be able to have any control over me. Turned out I had a soft spot for a certain Uchiha brat, which eventually can lead to my downfall.

I started to realize how tremendous of an influence Itachi had on me. I was beyond terrified, that brat was holding such power over me that it felt suffocating to me. A colossal risk, which will turn me into a human being; mould me into someone caring without me noticing anything. A weakness that will make me lose in every scenario if someone wants to go after him.

I was certain that I was not possessive of Itachi. I was just worried about his well being hence the protective nature of mine was showing. Uchiha Shisui can never be possessive of anything. Because I never had possessed that specific urge toward anybody. I never wanted anything or anybody all to myself. However, the protectiveness was still dangerous. 

Those realizations made me want to get rid of the brat as soon as possible. I wanted to leave Japan as soon as possible after my life changing realization. I had plans to go to the USA for my business management studies. My realization made me escalate that plan. I arranged everything for my departure without letting Itachi know anything about it. 

I remember the moment I broke the news to Itachi, he was devastated.

He was trying to stop his tears, “I didn’t graduate yet, are you going to abandon me?”

I replied, “The fact that this sentence of yours is making me guilty proves you already know how to take advantage of other people when convenient. You are 100 years too early to guilt trip me brat.”

But I was wrong. It was the first time in my life I failed to draw the right conclusion by watching someone’s reaction. Itachi was not guilt tripping me. He truly was afraid that I would abandon him. 

“I will miss you, Shisui”, his voice was quivering. 

_Shit, his emotions are genuine. As I thought, I don’t like it when he cries. I should stop him from brawling his eyes out. What do I do?_

I tried to lighten up the mood, “I won’t miss you brat, I’m happy that I don’t have to deal with you any further.”

It was weird; Even though I uttered those words to make Itachi hate me, I did not mean them. The kid got up and hugged me. His emotions were heart wrenching.

_I’m truly fucked. How the hell did I come to care about him so much?_

“Shisui, I really wish to spend more time with you”, Itachi sobbed while tears were getting smeared on my shirt. 

Before I could stop myself, I hugged him back and kissed on the top of his head. 

_You make me care about you; that’s why you need to go from my side brat. I can’t have a weakness now, Itachi._

“I’m going to come back, why are you giving me a funeral?” I tried to lighten up the situation.

_I’m never coming back, you already have become a weakness of mine._

“I get attached to people I care about. I don’t want to let you go.” With that Itachi kissed me on my left cheek.

_Shit. How do I tell him that I have to leave him behind because I was getting attached to him too._

All I could muster was, “Well that’s nothing new for an Uchiha to be possessive of people with whom they are close.”

It was able to stop Itachi’s tears for a short time, “What are you possessive of? I never found out.”

“Hum maybe I should give you an answer. I have all the worst Uchiha traits in an extreme manner. I’m obsessed with my goals, I like to break people, manipulate them until they are suffering. I’m extremely protective of my family. But my biggest secret as an Uchiha is I lack possessiveness. I don’t feel a possessive tendency toward anything or anyone Tachi kun.” I tried to show all my adoration for one last time by addressing him with the nickname I had given.

Itachi stopped crying and was assessing me with bewilderment. It was hard for anyone to believe what I said to Itachi. If Madara was right, then my pride for not being possessive was misplaced. I always had been proud that I was not possessive. However, if what he said was correct, if I truly was possessive of this little kid, I was unworthy of my pride. I decided not to think more about it as I was ready to get rid of Itachi.

This proved that I was not possessive and I was unable to feel that emotion.

Itachi decided to say, “I will find something that can remedy the situation. I will find something toward which you can act possessive. So, don’t be upset.” 

He sounded determined.

_I was sad? Why would I make a sad face now? I really don’t want to find someone to show possessiveness. I have seen Uchihas getting manipulated because of their blinding possessiveness. I even made the God Uchiha lose to me because he is possessive of his husband. It truly is a weakness._

Instead I replied, “Look at you, all grown up. So, it’s a promise Tachi kun. When I come back from the State, I will demand you to fulfill it.”

I flicked his forehead. He rubbed his forehead and smiled at me. Itachi left my house thinking I would come back to Japan immediately after finishing my studies. I left my house thinking never to set my foot on the country. I did not want to be manipulated because of my caring nature toward Itachi, I did not want to be a good human being because Itachi had influenced me too much for my own liking. 

I severed my emotional connection with Uchiha Itachi when he was only 6 years old because I was both afraid for him.

When I left Japan, I left everything behind. I was never a very emotional human being to begin with. I talked with my parents regularly and with Obito from times to times; but never with Itachi. I deliberately avoided him as I felt like he would be a hindrance to the horrible Uchiha that I truly was. I never tried to contact him, never asked about him. Nothing, I carefully locked the memories of Itachi in the darkest corner of my heart. I never thought about the impact my behavior will have on Itachi.

Itachi was just out of mind after a few months. I focused on my studies and on the new minions to whom I can cause suffering. I stayed in the USA for 8 years and wanted to settle down there; I planned to start a branch of Uchiha business there and for that, I had to visit Japan for one last time. Honestly speaking, Itachi was not to be found in any corner of my mind. I completely had forgotten the small, awkward kid who was able to sway my attention from my psychotic desires for a moment. 

When I was 23, I came back to my sweet home without informing anyone. My family cordially welcomed me in our house. My mom cried out of joy when she saw me and hugged me tightly. My father was trying his best not to cry, I could not really blame them. After all, they saw me after 8 years. After our tiny reunion, I went upstairs to go to my room. I freshened up and immediately collapsed on my bed. The journey left me exhausted. 

When I woke up, I went downstairs from my room but could not find anyone there. I went to the backyard pond hoping to find my mother there. An unknown Uchiha was sitting down there with my mom; I could see the long ponytail of that person as they were facing the opposite direction from me.

“Go easy on him”, my mom said to the person.

_Crap. Obito will have my head. Who else would be mad at me other than Obito? Since when he started to grow his hair?_

I approached them while thinking about many ways to calm Obito down.

“Try to understand him Shisui”, my mom left after saying that.

_Man I keep forgetting how insane Obito can get when he is mad. He would get mad because of my abrupt leave and for the lack of interaction after my departure._

The person stood up without facing me. Then suddenly I found myself thrown on the ground. I was punched hard on my face. That punch had thrown me off balanced. I was holding my nose and was trying to find if there was any significant damage.

_Obito just punched me!_

“You fucking moron, how dare you cut off every contact and don’t visit Japan.”

I was immensely surprised as the voice did not belong to Obito, “I appreciate the emotional outburst, but who are you?” I asked while trying to stand. 

Punch on my gut, “Haaa!!! Now you pretend not to recognize me? You think pretending will save you from my wrath?” I stumbled over the ground again.

I spoke with too much pain, “If I say I recognize that you are an Uchiha, will you stop beating the shit out of me?”

“Which Uchiha am I, you asshole?”

“The other Uchiha who is very close to me is Obito. But you are not Obito. Who are you?”

I stood up and finally looked properly at my assaulter and I could hear something like a switch going off in my head. 

I always laughed at the cheesy romantic movies where you meet a person and immediately know that you are destined to be together. I never believed in love at first sight because I found it way too sappy for my taste. I laughed at tons of girls for declaring falling for me immediately after our first meet. Those movies, those girls were laughing at me as I was looking at beautiful dark eyes.

_Damn, I WANT HIM._

For the first time in my life, I understood why Uchihas feel the need to make someone theirs. The beauty in front of me just took my breath away. I wanted to trace his long hair with my fingers, I wanted to have him, I wanted to love him, I wanted to devour those beautiful pink lips, I wanted to make sure that he becomes mine in every sense.

_Who is this person? This Uchiha man is way too beautiful. How did he manage to stay off my radar for this long? I never knew of any such Uchihas from his age group. He looks like he is around his late teen. Moreover he is feisty just like I want in a partner. He is just made for me._

_He is only a few inches shorter than me; damn he will fit perfectly against me when I hug him. He is so skinny, I will be able to pin him down on my bed so easily. He will look divine when I debouch him. I want this voice to moan out my name. I need to get my hands on him as soon as possible. I need TO MAKE HIM MINE. I NEED TO HAVE HIM ALL TO MYSELF._

“Oh, you really don’t recognize me!” 

The bitterness in his voice startled me and snapped me out of my lewd thoughts.

_I am supposed to know this person? Why the hell I never felt the desire to make him mine before? Why would I let him go? What was I even thinking?_

I was storming my brain to find out something, anything about the man I was facing. However, I found nothing. I could not remember meeting this Uchiha ever in my life. I had a clear idea about his sexuality. If I finds someone attractive, I would manipulate them to ask me out. It was a sick guilty pleasure of mine. I wanted another person to be the one to make all the efforts. Once I get them out of the system, I simply forget their existence. But I never felt such strong desire to have someone all to myself before for any of my previous attractions. 

_This man standing in front of me had triggered a trait inside me that I never thought existed. I always thought I’m incapable of feeling possessiveness. This beauty is proving me wrong._

_Moreover he seems really hurt because of my inability to recognize him. It is an indication that we used to be rather close; but who is the Uchiha that I was so close with? And I let go of such beauty without taking him to my bed? Was I hesitant because he was younger? I don’t remember putting off any of my attractions because they were young. What stopped me before? It doesn’t matter. I will make him mine. Damn, I want to kiss that column of his elegant neck._

“Who are you?” I asked hesitantly. It was getting more difficult for me to keep my desires to myself.

“I can't believe I thought you cared.” The young man was laughing hysterically; his face stated that the laugh was an outlet of his sadness.

The long haired Uchiha was trying to keep his emotions under control. He was looking at me, waiting for some sudden declaration like, “How could I ever forget you?”

But of course nothing came from me as I truly did not have any idea who he was. The grief on his face was intensifying as the time was passing. Somehow, that was making me sad.

_I don’t want you to be upset, please tell me how I can make you feel better._

“I can’t believe Obito ni was correct. You just don’t cherish people, you are heartless and cruel. I was expecting that you would deny all of these. You would say something dramatic like you had amnesia and that’s why you forgot about me. I was expecting a logical explanation for your behaviour. I expected you to give me a reason, which will take my hurt away. ” 

The agony in his voice was crushing me.

_He is younger than us as he calls Obito big brother. He is sounding more and more like my past romantic ventures. Of course I never cared but my behavior made them believe the opposite. I never dated any Uchiha though. Who is he? Why is he so devastated? And how the fuck is his grief making me empathetic? Is this what happens when Uchihas fall for someone seriously?_

I was wrecking his brain to find who the other Uchiha was so that I can alleviate his sadness.

 _Nope, not ringing a bell. His behavior suggests that I have done enough to make him inconsolable. What did you do Shisui? Try to remember._ _If I want him to make mine, I will have to amend for whatever I did._

All I wanted to do was hug him and say that everything was going to be alright. 

_I’m already sounding extremely lovesick in my head. Maybe if I apologize, he will feel better._

“I’m sorry”, I apologized.

The other Uchiha pleaded in a broken whisper, “Please Shisui, tell me you at least know why you are apologizing.”

The anguish drenched voice of the unknown Uchiha was killing me of guilt.

“I really can’t recall you but I feel like I have done something terrible to you. I want to re-establish our acquaintance.”

_I don’t remember what I did. Please give me another chance to prove that I can be the best lover you can ask for. I will never do anything to hurt you. I will kill anyone if you ask me to. Please don’t be sad anymore. Wait, is this how I am going to for the rest of my life?_

The other Uchiha grabbed me by my collar, “You piece of trash.”

My mind was getting out of his control.

_Our faces are too close; if I kiss him, will he forgive me?_

Then I was headbutted by the shorter Uchiha. That triggered the memory of a tiny Uchiha whom I conveniently kept well hidden within the boundary of his mind.

_Oh,_

_Ohh,_

_Ohhhh, I only know one violent Uchiha who will act like this._

_It’s him!_

_Why the hell I have to fall for him?_

_Fuck my life._

I was beyond surprised and panicked when I said that one name that I stubbornly had forgotten, “Itachi!”

I recognized the Uchiha.

I understood why he was so devastated.

I wished I did not realize the bitter truth that I was running away from.

Itachi entered in my life for the second time and made me question Karma again, “Why would you punish me like this?”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shisui is confronted my Obito, who of course gives him a hard time. 
> 
> Shisui struggles more to keep his emotoins under control.

**Shisui’s POV**

Itachi let go of me. His face contorted in pain, eyes blazing like hellfire. I wanted to alleviate his anguish.

_Maybe complimenting his height will help to pacify his anger?_

“Damn you got tall.”

Itachi kicked me on my knees. 

“Wait, aren’t you like 10 years old? Why do you look so grown up?”

_I found someone who actually completed the wired set of Uchiha characteristics in me, and it’s this kid. No no no, this is so wrong. Oh my god. Oh my god. I’m so fucked. Shit. Is this my punishment for all the time I broke the hearts of other people?_

He was getting angrier with passing time, “I’m 14. You don’t even remember my age.”

_Damn puberty did hit him hard._

I was frantically trying to keep the conversation going without letting Itachi know my inner state, “Why are you so tall already? I remembered you barely could reach the height of 4 years old, you look like a MAN NOW.”

_Nice try to deflect the issue of concern Shisui. At first you hurt him, now you are making him remember is insecurities. Follow that course of action and within no time you will be killed by this handsome devil. I’m doomed. Why do I have to feel anything for this brat? HE IS NOT LEGAL, OH GOD. AM I A PEDOFILE RIGHT NOW? SHIT._

I tried to just concentrate on our conversation, the panic can wait until Itachi goes away from my vicinity. 

Itachi bit out of frustration, “Once an asshole, always an asshole. You just didn’t change Shisui.”

I replied out of reflex, “Call me oni chan brat.”

“Hah! Call you oni chan? Earn my respect you bastard.” 

He was the only person outside of my family who could always get away with insulting me. Itachi’s this specific reply always remined me of an angry kitten and it was always looked cute to me.

_But that did not sound cute as it used to do before. It sounded hot._

_Wait, don’t call me oni chan. Those words from your mouth will do surprising things to my libido. I really want to facepalm right now so badly. I'm utterly fucked._

“You are lucky that I haven’t knocked you out yet”, Itachi hissed.

Itachi’s threat was making me fall for him more and more. I never knew I craved for a partner with such a harsh temper so badly. 

_Itachi please stop. You are just making it harder for me to stop my lewd thoughts._

My brain was registering thousands ways to stop my desire for Itachi. 

_This is wrong. Yes, he does look like a legal person but he is not. Nothing good will come from it if I lose my shit because I have fallen for him. What happened to the little cute brat? Where is he? Bring him back. I would rather deal with bratty Itachi rather than dealing with the hot as fuck, grown up Itachi._

Suddenly his body language changed. 

“It’s nice to meet you again after so many years”, he delivered with a proper Uchiha bow.

_What? Why is Itachi being polite? Wasn’t he trying to beat the life out of me just a moment ago? Has he turned bipolar? Go back to being mean to me Itaaachiii. I was enjoying it so much._

_Wait, now I sound bipolar._

“Shisui, Obito came to meet you”, I heard my mom entering the backyard.

_So that’s the reason why you turned respectful. You little devil._

“Ah aunt Haee, I will have to go home. Sasuke doesn’t like it when I skip on him”, acting as polite as ever in front of my mom. Itachi started to leave without bidding me goodbye.

_Who is Sasuke? Boyfriend? Itachi don’t leave me. I wanna talk to you more.  
_

I was whiningin my head.

I tried to stop him, “Itach-

“We'll talk later Shisui.” Itachi did not let me finish my sentence and left.

I had to let him go even though I hated doing so. After he left, I came inside the house where Obito was waiting for me.That was another problem. I did not know how to open a conversation with him, I was too afraid of his reaction.

My mom left us alone by saying, "Be civil, boys."

Obito asked in a furious voice immediately she left, “Why did you come back? I thought you have run away for good. Why is the coward showing his face?”

I told him the lie that I believed to be the truth, “I didn’t run away.”

_I had to run because Itachi was becoming a threat to me about which I was totally ignorant. If I didn’t leave, he would have been caught in crossfire between Madara and I. Madara had threatened me with Itachi._

“Sure whatever makes you sleep at night better.” Obito was bitter.

I deadpanned, “I’m insomniac.”

Obito did not fall back from insulting me, “Sure whatever helps you not to sleep. Why did you come back bastard?”

I stayed calm, “My parents are happily married. I want to open a branch of Uchiha business in USA. I decided to visit Japan before that”, I started to discuss my plan.

He barked back, “I should have known, you are too selfish to come back in Japan just to pay us a visit.”

“You know me too well.”

After few moments of silence he asked, “How did Itachi take your return? I guess he didn’t give you that much of hard time. After all, the kid always loved you; that’s why he had forgiven you when you threw him out of his life. That kid sure has a heart of gold. ”

“About that-“

“Wait a minute. What do you mean by he always loved me?”

“Well Itachi’s parent only could bring him back from village when they promised that you will take over his training. You always have been very important to him. He had been idolizing you god knows since when, he was practically obsessed with becoming like Shisui before even meeting you. He became more attached to you during the months you were his mentor. Even though he was devastated from your attitude after leaving Japan, he was able to forgive you. Where else I could not really do the same as him.”

_Itachi always loved me!! What kind of love was that? I really hope he did not love me as a big brother. It would be too awkward then. Also, I always have been important for him? Why the fuck I did not know that? Was I not known to be the most observant Uchiha? How the hell had I fucked everything up when it came to Itachi.’_

Dread was crawling in my back as I understood the gravity of my previous action, “I actually did something horrible to him.”

Obito glared at me, “Worse than severing connection with a 6 years old and never looking back?”

I started to get irritated, “Will you stop making me feel guilty?”

“You have feelings!" Obito exclaimed furiously. 

"How would one think that the famous asshole Uchiha Shisui is capable of feeling guilt”, he spitted out.

“Obito, I know that you are mad at me. But please let me tell you how I fucked up. It will definitely cheer you up.”

“Fine, what did you do?” Obito looked both mad and curious at the same time. 

“I didn’t recognize him.”

_Maybe telling Obito was a bad idea. I was preparing myself to face a mad Obito, not a murderous one. Obito is becoming very quiet, which never is a good idea._

Obito calmly asked, “You could not recognize Itachi? His face didn’t change that much for last 8 years. How the fuck you forgot his face?”

I replied honestly, “I locked Itachi related everything in the darkest corner of my mind so that I don't feel guilty. All I remembered was a scrawny kid who was too short. How am I supposed to know that they are the same person?”

He fisted his hands in balls, “I want to punch you so bad Shisui. What is wrong with you? Leaving everything behind and coming after so many years to wreck another havoc.”

“I’m sorry.” My sincere apology surprised Obito.

“Owww, I never thought the day will come, when you apologize earnestly."

_I’m always true to my heart when it comes to Itachi. That one Uchiha had always been the bane of my existance. Even now, he is turning my whole life upside down without knowing anyting about it.  
_

Obito asked rather softly, "How did Itachi took it?”

I grimmanced, “Not happily of course. I even managed to wonder how he got so tall.”

Obito threw the nearest flower vase at me and screamed, “What the fuck is wrong with you? Why are you hurting him like that? You never caused so much damage when dealing with the same person. Why doesn’t Karma curse you to hell?” 

I got irritated at his childish behaviour, “Stop acting like a toddler. Want to know what Karma had done to me?”

Obito’s angry reply, “What? Gifted you with a psycho like you? No, that won’t be a punishment for you. You will dance naked if you get someone with enough similarities with you. You FUCKING PIG.”

_Obito, I have fallen for Itachi, I cannot look at his face without wanting to hug him, kiss him and make him completely mine. Don’t you think that is punishment enough? I truly feel like a pig._

All I could manage as a reply was, “Never mind. Just tell me something, why are you so protective of Itachi?”

_Obito, reply wisely. I know your undoubted devotion to Kakashi. So, it's not possible for you to have a relationship with him that I won't approve. Also, I won’t hesitate to kill if you threaten my chance with Itachi because you are an overprotective big brother. No matter how fond I’m of you._

He let out a deep sigh, “I was always close to him because of the time we spent together in Konoha. After you left, I couldn’t let him suffer from agony. I tried to help him out and that’s how I became so protective of him. I made a promise to myself, I’m never letting you hurt him again you jerk.”

_This is bad. He will kill me as soon as I utter my desire to make Itachi mine._

We sat down for a while in uncomfortable silence. Obito tried to remedy the situation, “So you plan to set up your business in the state?”

I hesitantly replied, “I wanted to stay at Japan for few months. But I will leave tomorrow on the early flight.”

“Why?”

_So that I don’t do anything to Itachi, which I will regret later. The kid is only 14 years old in spite of his appearance._

“I don’t feel like I will do anything great if I stay here for so many days”, I bitterly replied with a lie. 

“What about Itachi? You already broke the kid once, He was inconsolable when you left and you didn’t have the decency to contact with him. What will happen when you leave again so abruptly again?”

I replied candidly, “I don’t know Obito.”

Obito angrily said, “He was trying to find a way to contact with you for first few months. He was desperate to know how you were doing. The kid thought you were just too busy. He kept telling himself that one day you will talk to him. I told him so many times that you fucking don’t care. The kid decided to give you benefit of doubt. Now you are thinking about abandoning him again without taking responsibility for what you did.”

_If I hadn’t left, Madara would have chewed Itachi up. All I wanted to do is protect him.However, that doesn’t change the fact that I was the one to hurt him._

I was trying to hide the pain from my voice, “I never knew. I never wanted to cause any problem to him. Why didn’t my parents tell me about this?”

“Aunt Haee didn’t want to cause distress to you. You were having hard time adjusting in there. Also you never asked them about him.” Obito threw accusation at me.

He continued, “Uncle Fugaku had a very difficult time with Itachi that time. Itachi became alright after few months. But it broke everyone’s heart to see the kid so upset. It was understandable as he always admired you and wanted to grow up like you.”

_Fuck. How will I make up for the amount of pain I caused my Itachi?I don’t want to be the person he idolized. I want to be the person, whom he will hold close when you go to sleep every night. I want to be the person who will wake up with him in the mornings. I want to be the love of his life that can always make him happy. I have truly and utterly fucked up everything._

“For a long time, I thought that he hated me. I honestly didn’t know he would be this upset”, I tried to clear my head, which was only thinking about how to make Itachi mine.

Obito’s bitter reply, “Sure, whatever makes you justify your actions.”

I tried to divert the flow of the conversation, “You never told me anything about Itachi’s state.”

_I don’t think it would have changed anything. One of the reason I left Itachi so that he can have a happy life without 2 psychos playing tug of war with him.’_

“Cause I didn’t think you would care enough.” Obito's honesty startled me. He truly knows me too well, but not when it came to Itachi. I abandoned that little boy because I cared too much.

“You were wrong.”

“So you care for him but you never asked about him once? How about now? Why you want to leave without reconciling with him? I thought you cared.” The sarcasm coated voice was making me angry because it was making me realize how I could not have Itachi all to myself yet.

The anger got the best of me and I bitted out, “I want to leave because I’m trying to protect him. Just like I did 8 years earlier.” 

I confessed a truly hidden fact for the first time I my life because of my anger.

Of course Obito did not believe me, “That is just a great line. Protect from what exactly Shisui? Only thing he needs protection from is you.”

I could not agree more, “Exactly, you are right. So, I will leave tomorrow. It’s really nice to see you getting all overprotective over him.”

“Kakashi and I had to deal with the kid a lot when he was going through emotional breakdowns. Somehow, staying close to us made him stay strong.”

My single worded reply, “Oh.”

_It feels really nice to know that my Itachi is well loved and protected._

“Why are you running away? As I already noticed, you don’t care enough about him. So tell me, why do you disguise your true reason behind a lie of you protecting him. You don’t care about him for a little bit. You just lie to make everything easy. You are worse than a pig. You just to whatever you want, without thinking how others will be affected by it. You bastar-

I could not take it anymore and I snapped out, “I had to leave before because I didn’t want Madara to hurt him. I will have to leave now because I want to make him mine Obito.” 

I spilled the beans because I could not take the blames from Obito anymore. Obito's face became white like a sheet.

“WHAT!!!!!”

“YES.”

“WHY?”

“HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW? HE JUST JUMPED ON ME AND ALL I COULD THINK WAS I WANT THIS UCHIHA TO BE MINE. HE DOESN’T LOOK LIKE A 14 YEARS OLD FOR GOD'S SAKE. IF I DON'T LEAVE, THIS SITUATION WILL GET WORSE. I WILL WANT HIM MORE, I WILL NOT HAVE CONTROL OVER MY ACTIONS. I HAVE TO LEAVE OBITO.”

Surprisingly, my confession cooled down Obito’s anger. He said with pity in his voice, “This is so fucked up. The only person you wanted to be yours is out of your reach."

"No need to rub salts in my wounds."

Obito started to laugh hysterically, "Ah, sweet Karma is such a nice bitch.”

_Could not agree more. She threw Itachi twice at me, both time I was unprepared for what was in front of me._

I replied, “As much I hate your happiness over my misery, I need you to do something.” 

“Yes?”

“Don’t tell him about this, I will go back to state. Nothing needs to be done. Itachi doesn’t need to know. When time comes, I will make my move on him. That is if he wants me in his life. I want to make up for all the hard feelings I have imposed upon him”, I said like a reasonable adult who had discovered his feelings for a youngling. 

Obito looked like he was considering my request. Then he asked innocently, “You know what?”

_Oh no no no. I can see the sadistic grin on his face. He is going to ask me to do something that will cause great deal of pain to me._

Obito continued, “If you truly want to repent on what you did to Itachi, why not stay here? Watch the person you desire parading around you, you incapable of approaching him.”

I growled, “I’m not that stupid Obito. I won’t be able to control my action around him.”

_I will definitely snap and kiss the boy silly if he shows his anger to me one more time. I'm discovering too much new fetishes of mine._

“Is the famous Shisui Uchiha afraid of losing control around a kid?” Obito taunted.

“Shut the fuck up”, I hissed.

Obito said at last, “You still are selfish. Running away from Itachi. It’s not fair to him Shisui.”

I replied angrily, “What’s more unfair is a man 9 years older than him trying to establish a romantic relationship with him. If I have to choose one, I will select the lesser evil. I will according to you run away.”

“That is Itachi’s decision to make. Not yours. You have lost the privilege to decide whether to enter a relationship with him the moment you abandoned Itachi. He should be the one to decide, which one is lesser evil.” 

I truly hated Obito's shiny eyes which were screaming, suffer asshole, suffer.

I coolly replied, “He is a kid. I am doing him a favour.”

It made Obito snap at me, “You want to do a favour to him. Then stay, make amends, make up for those days when itachi was hurt and do nothing to make him yours. Stay and burn in your created hell. Don’t run away, Shisui. Be a man and take responsibility for your actions.”

Eventually I decided to stay. Not because I wanted to make Itachi mine, but because I needed to make up for last 8 years.

I promised myself two things that night.

One was I will do everything on my capability to make Itachi happy. The other one was I will never make a romantic advance toward him. 

Why? Because it was wrong. He still was a kid.

**End of POV**

**Itachi’s POV**

Meeting Shisui for the first time was a very unpleasant event for me. He made me cry without really knowing about my insecurities. However, with time our relationship started to get better.

Even though Uchihas are supposed to go through the 'specific training' when they are 8, I was an exception. The early onset for my training happened because everybody wanted to get Shisui's sadistic urges under control. I knew about this information because I overheard my parents, so I always thought Shisui would immensely hate me. However, I was proven wrong by him numerous times. 

How do I put it?

Shisui was making efforts to win over my affection. He was trying his best to make up for the damages he had caused. Shisui would always try to know about things I like and things I hate, he would try to indulge me even though my requests were not something he was thrilled about. 

For example our movie time, Shisui would sit straight through a kid's movie just because I wanted to watch it. I would nag my father to get me the DVDs and then I would always want them to watch with him. The reason at first was to annoy him. However, after a while I started to enjoy his inputs about those movies. He would always say they were tortures, but I got the vive that he pretty much liked those. 

There was also the time when he would help me out whenever I needed help with anything. Of course, I was yet to forgive him. However, toward the last days of our interaction, I started to warm up to him.

Afterall, I had been idolizing him for a long time. Therefore, his attempts to win over me made him look like an angel in my eyes. Our days were going as usual, until the day Shisui decided to let me know about one of his major decision.

When Shisui told me he was leaving for higher studies, I could not contain my tears. I was devastated to think of Shisui leaving my life. Fear of abandonment was crawling onto the surface of my brain. I did not want to let him go, he smiled by saying it was ok to feel possessive toward him. I wondered how he could let me go, when I was unable to do the same. 

Then Shisui said he was not possessive of anything, it took me by surprise. I expected him to be extremely possessive to as his obsession, sadism and manipulative nature knew no bounds. It made me sad that he did not have someone, toward whom he could feel the strong emotions I could feel. I did not know that Shisui considered them to be weaknesses and he was proud to have no such emotions. Without knowing this,I promised him, I would find something toward which he can show possessiveness. Shisui agreed with the kindest smile. 

Shisui soothed my sadness by saying he would come back. He never breaks his promises. I knew he would come back. I let him go. The last memory of Shisui in my brain was me hugging him tightly and crying on his shoulder while he held me on his lap. I was never proud of my small suture, but still that memory had always been precious to me. That memory was proof that Shisui cared about me, he cared enough to plant small kisses on the top of my head to stop my crying.

I have lost my contacts with him since then. He never contacted me, never tried to talk with me again.

I waited and waited.

However, I got no words from him.

When I realised, Shisui had completely cut me off, I did not know how to process the information. I feared, but never thought he would truly abandon me, yet Shisui proved me wrong by doing something completely opposite. He went to the states and abandoned me. 

Back then I had poor control over my emotion, I did what I could do best. I bawled my eyes out for days. My parents were devastated and could not console me. Obito ni and Kakashi ni had always been there to cheer me up, take me out to play, buy me candies. However, nothing filled the chasm Shisui had created. I was stubborn enough not to let anyone tell Shisui about my emotional turmoils. My situation was not getting anybetter as my fear of my close people abandoning me resurfaced.Nobody knew what to do with my sadness.

Eventually my grandparents decided to take me to the village again and help me recover. It worked, as there were more people with whom I was emotionally attached. I only got to spend 3 months with him, but those months were some of my my happiest days because of the presence of Shisui. Gradually I healed, to a point where my young heart was trying to justify Shisui's action. 

_I'm not really someone that much important to him, it makes sense that he doesn’t talk with me. Maybe he already forgot about me. It hurts badly, but he said he will come back._

I was waiting for that to happen. With time people around me thought I had forgiven Shisui, as I started to refer to him in a normal manner, for example "Shishui taught me to do that" and so on. He trully had tought me lots of stuff. At one point, even I started to think that I have forgiven him. I got over the hurt and started to happly lead my life. My life was going on. 

Time went by and I became 14, the childish intense emotions were a little bit more manageable for me. I was no more the emotional kid. I would say I have turned to be the perfect Uchiha throughout time.

Honestly, the grown up, rational me could not even see what Shisui did wrong. We were acquainted for only three months, it was normal for him to not talk to me again. I had long forgiven Shisui for his negligence toward me after leaving the country. That's what I told myself. 

I was proven wrong when I knew Shisui returned to Japan. My previous arguments regarding how it was ok for Shisui to not talk to me went straight out of my mind the moment I heard about his arrival. I wanted to confront him, hirt him for causing me pain.

I hoped that he had reasons for avoiding me in the past.

I wanted to know how his days were in the states. How many days he would stay in Japan.

I was dying to meet him.

These things were clear indicators that my obsession regarding him did not really reduce that much. It had been just latent for a while.

I was ambivalent about meeting him again after so many years. I did not know how Shisui would interact with me. Aunt Haee wanted me to go easy on him. I practiced like a mantra that I will pleasantly greet him, exchange pleasantries and I will ask him why he did that with me. If he replied, I would listen to his explanation and respect his choice. However, when I saw him standing there, listening to aunt Haee, my mind stopped working.

Shisui became taller, he looked more mature and handsome; apart from that, nothing really changed much. He still was the Shisui that I was obsessed with throughout my whole life. All I could think was making him hurt for the pain he had caused me. When he finished his talk with aunt Haee and he faced toward me, I punched him without registering what I was doing.

_Why am I punching him! Doesn’t matter. He deserves it._

Then he provided fuel for my anger as he could not recognize me. I wanted to hurt him so bad, I wanted to make him cry like I used to do when he left. I wanted him to feel my agony, my sorrow, my inability to hate him, my incapability to hold a grudge against him. In the end, things did not work out like I wanted to. 

“I can’t believe Obito ni was correct. You just don’t cherish people, you are heartless and cruel. I was expecting that you would deny all of these. You would say something dramatic like you had amnesia and that’s why you forgot about me. I was expecting a logical explanation for your behaviour. I expected you to give me a reason, which will take my hurt away.”

He had the audacity to reply, “I am sorry.” 

I was begging him to recognize me, “Please Shisui, tell me you at least know why you are apologizing.”

He seemed troubled by my outburst, but he still did not recognize me, “I really can’t recall you but I feel like I have done something terrible to you. I want to re-establish our acquaintance.”

_Re-establish our acquaintance?_

_You were the one to ruin everything._

_Why would I even hope for you to apologize?_

_Why would I have to possess such intense emotions for you?_

Shisui only recognized me when I headbutted him just like the first day we fought. I tried my best not to burst into tears in front of him. I was angry, frustrated and devastated; I felt like the dam of my emotions would break open in front of him. An asshole like him never deserved all those emotions from me that I dearly harbour for him. 

When I came back to my house, I started to cry. I did it a lot when he was not there in my life anymore. He came back, but he still managed to hurt me with his words. I still was crying because as always, I was a nobody to Uchiha Shisui.

Did I want him to stay in my life?

Yes. Surprisingly I did not have the gut to let him go for the second time.

Can I let him be the Shisui I idolize again?

No. Too many things had changed. I was no longer the obsessed kid who thought Shisui was the best human being.

Then what will be Shisui's position in my life? Why do I still want him?

_He can never be my big brother. The brotherly feelings I had for Obito ni and Sasuke, it was never present in case of him._

_He can never be a friend. We are too apart to act like buddies._

_He cannot be a family. I was too hurt by his actions._

I cooled down my head and started to think. I did not want to stay as an insignificance by his side. I wanted to be someone to him, whom he never can ignore. I could not decide why Shisui was so important in my life. Most of the time all he did was make me sad; but I still can’t forget the good memories we had together. 

I had no expectation from that asshole, still I wanted to spend my time with him. I could not forgive him for not remembering me, still I wanted to drill the idea of me inside his head. I wanted to talk with him for hours about the silliest things in the universe. I still wanted to take him to Konoha and show him around, show him all the precious things that are there. I wanted to make more memories with him. 

I never wanted to lose him again. The first time he left me, I did not know that I was being abandoned. But not anymore. I will never let him do the same thing again. I promised myself a simple thing. No matter what, never let Shisui run away again.

Amongst all these emotional whirlpools, I failed to notice the drastic shift at my obsession for him. I did not want to turn into like Shisui when I grow up anymore.

I wanted him to stay with me.

I never wanted to let go off him again.

**End of POV**

**Shisui’s POV**

I went to uncle Fugaku's house to meet Itachi and apologise to him after the day of my return. I was greeted by two tremendously angry Uchihas.

Uncle Fugaku gritted without trying to hide the animosity, “What do you want?”

Aunt Mikoto was not that kind. She said, “Get out of my house. You have done enough damage.”

I did not know what to say, how to defend me. Yet I tried, “I’m here to apologise to him.”

Aunt Mikoto was furious, “You didn’t even recognise my sweet boy. How could you hurt him like that Shisui? You never was this cruel, why choose Itachi to torture? Do you know how difficult it was for us to convince him that we're not leaving him just like you did? Just when we thought you can’t cause more problems, you are again here. You decided to throw my little boy in hell again. Why Shisui?”

Her voice cracked toward the last sentence.

_My pride of not having any weakness has made me do something that I immensely regret. How devastated was my Itachi when I stupidly cut him off my life?_

Uncle Fugaku angrily said, “We have to send him back to the village for 1 year. He had to stay with his grandparents to be assured that they are not abandoning him too.”

“You are lucky that we have a good relationship with your family. Or else I would have killed you for hurting my sweet Itachi.” Aunt Mikoto's eyes screamed intense desire to make me suffer.

_How can I repent for the sufferings I have caused?_

“Aunt-

“Don’t even dare to call me that. I would have never let you inside my house. But, your mom convinced me otherwise. She wanted us to give you a chance. Tell me Shisui, why should I even consider it?”

I truthfully answered, “Because I will never hurt Itachi. I promise.”

The Uchihas did not look convinced or thrilled. 

“Please, I never wanted to hurt him. If I have known-”

“Cut the bullshit. Even if you knew, you would not have cared, Shisui. You are not capable of feeling any positive emotion, I should have trusted all other Uchihas when they were saying it. I always deep down inside, you still had some good traits similar to your parents. Turns out you are just the most rotten Uchiha that can ever exist. Try again, why the hell should I let you see my son again?”

I have never seen aunt Mikoto so furious.

I softly said, “I’m standing here because I want to atone for the pain that I unknowingly caused aunt. I wasn’t aware what I was to him.”

“How could you not know how important you are to him, Shisui?”

_Are to him, not were. Is that an indication that Itachi might let me get close to him again?_

I decided to be honest with them, “I can say the truth, but you can’t let Itachi know that. I want to be the one to explain why I severed my connection with him.”

Uncle Fugaku did not look happy, but aunt said, “Let us hear what you have to say, we will decide if you truly are worthy of apologizing to Itachi.”

I took a deep breath and gathered all my strength, “Before I left, I had a fight with uncle Madara. I successfully managed to defeat him fair and square.”

The jaws of the Uchihas in front of me dropped.

“What! How is that even possible!”

“No wonder he loathes you so much.”

They simultaneously exclaimed.

I kept explaining, “Uncle Madara was looking for a way to get back at me.”

“But you don’t have any weakness. It is impossible for anyone to get back at you”, uncle Fugaku said.

I replied while remembering the incident, “That’s what I thought, until he said he will go against Itachi.”

Aunt Mikoto screamed, “I WILL SKIN THAT PSYCHO ALIVE.”

Uncle Fugaku was beyond astounded and furious, “Itachi was your weakness! That fucking old maniac was bragging for days that he knows how to control you. HE MEANT HE WOULD DO SO THROUGH OUR SON. I WILL KILL HIM.”

_The feeling is mutual. I want to tear everyone down who even thinks of harming my Itachi._

I continued calmly, “I lost control and snapped at him. I threatened to slaughter him. The problem was I realized how important Itachi was to me. You can imagine how Madara can be when he was defeated, I was afraid of Itachi’s safety. I left because I did not want Madara to hurt him. However, that was not the only reason. I was scared that Itachi would change me into someone that I don’t even know, he had that much influence on me. I freaked out. That was my reason to leave Itachi behind I never knew how important I was to him but I never wanted to hurt him. So, I’m here to ask for his forgiveness.”

Aunt Mikoto replied after a lonf pause, “He can still have a similar influence on you, he can still your weakness. Will you abandon him again if that happens?”

_No, I am not leaving him in this lifetime. I decided to make him mine. He will be mine and stay by my side._

“No, I’m better suited to fight against anyone that can threaten Itachi than I was before 8 years. I will never cause him pain again. That’s a promise.”

In the end, I was able to convince them that I meant well. I stood at the garden as aunt Mikoto had requested. After a while Itachi joined me. He had dark circles around his beautiful eyes which were also red and puffy. Those eyes were saying that he had cried a lot after the encounter with me.

_You asshole, you are the one who broke him. You wanted to protect him by running away? This is what happens when you do so. Stay with him and try to keep your promises to yourself._

I wanted to comfort him but I knew I did not have the right to do so anymore. I went toward him. I did not know where to start. 

I started with a simple apology, “I’m sorry.”

“Why?” The lack of emotions behind his voice was causing me immense pain.

“I caused you pain.” I replied while keeping my eyes fixed on him.

Itachi averted my gaze and coldly replied, “I know you don’t care. Why are you here?”

_Not true. I care more than I should have._

“Hurting you is one thing I never wanted to do, Itachi.”

_Please believe me._

“Your actions proved that”, the voice of Itachi was getting bitter, it was not cold anymore.

_Is it a good sign? At least he is showing some emotions toward me._

“I want to make up for all the pains I have caused you. I want to make you happy Itachi.” Before I could stop me, I had closed the distance between us and was running my hands through Itachi’s long hair. Just like I used to do when he was a kid. Though his hair was not long back then.

_Please let me in for one more time. I will definitely protect you this time._

I tucked his hairs behind his left ear. The ear tip was turning red.

_He had grown up but he still has the habit to get embarrassed over silly things._

“Why did you avoid me?” Itachi asked, the voice was still laced with pain.

_How much damage have I caused to you Itachi? Will I ever be able to heal those ugly scars that I imposed on you?_

“I was scared, Itachi. I thought nothing good will come for none of us if you keep associating with me. Forgive me.”

It was partially true, he did not need to know about the threat that was thrown from Madara yet.

Itachi was intently examining my face. I did not know what he saw but he said, “I just can’t forgive you, I tried so many times since yesterday. I couldn’t. I made my peace with the fact that you have abandoned me. I thought I will be alright. Then when I saw you after so many years, I realized that the feeling of getting hurt by you did not actually leave me. It came back at full force when I encountered you. Then you didn’t even recognize me. It feels like I’m a nobody to you. I can’t forgive you Shisui.”

His voice cracked when he stated that he was a nobody to me. Tears started to pool in his eyes.

_Ahhhh, this is bad. I still am vulnerable to his ugly crying. I am the reason he is crying. How stupid was I to not notice how he cared for me?_

“You were never a nobody to me.” I tugged him into a strong hug. He wrapped his hands around my waists and dropped his forehead on my shoulder. Then he let his emotions break loose and brawl his eys out. 

The scene was too similar for my comfort to the time when I told him about my leave. After a while I caught myself planting small kisses on the top of his head. It was an instinct to do so. I used to do that all the time to him. Placing small kisses on the top of little Itachi's head.

_My feelings for you are not innocent anymore Itachi. I have lost the right to plant kisses on you yesterday. Forgive me for doing it right now. I don’t know how else to comfort you Itachi._

Itachi kept weeping within my embrace, I kept uttering reassurance in his ears that I truly was there for him. After a while Itachi pulled back. His whole face was redder than before from the crying. I let my embrace loose around him and started to wipe his tears. However, he did not let go of my arm and stayed like that. His one hand was wrapped around my arm.

I tried to lighten the mode, “You still are a crybaby Itachi.”

He groaned, “Oh my god, I almost forgot how much I hated your gut!”

I smiled fondly at him and said like our first meeting, “Let’s start anew, I’m Uchiha Shisui. Nice to make your acquaintance.” 

I saw Itachi’s eyes going visibly wide, “I'm Uchiha Itachi. Sorry, I made you uncomfortable yesterday.”

He said with an embarrassed face and scooted over closer to me.

_Fuck, does he know how kissable he looks right now? I want to kiss him. Shit, shit, shit. This is an emergency. I should put 2 feet of distance between us. I need to say something, which will make him pull away. As it seems, I’m having a tough time to get my hands off him._

I removed my arm from his hand and said, “You never change Itachi, you are just the little kid I left behind. Angry at one moment and embarrassed for your anger at the following moment.”

As expected, Itachi got irritated, “I’m not a kid anymore Shisui, I’m almost as tall as you.” Itachi took the bait and became distracted.

“You are 5 inches shorter and 9 years younger you freaking brat. How many times do I have to tell you to show me respect?”

**End of POV**

When Shisui called him a kid, Itachi was extremely irritated. He did not want to be treated as a toddler. 

_Why does it get to my head when he calls me a kid? I don’t want to be a kid to him. What do I want to be in Shisui's eye?_

“Really? You want my respect that much? Itachi looked into his eyes straightly. Shisui was rubbing his neck with his hands.

_He only does that when he is nervous. Why is he nervous?_

Shisui replied honestly, “Yes, I demand to be respected brat. Also, I will make sure I don’t mess things up this time. Though it will be extremely difficult as I barely know anything about the grown up you.”

_He is nervous about me._

“Hei Shisui, how about we start to spend some time together like we used to do? You can do your work, I will do mine. Or we can plan things that we can do together.

“If you want that, I will be happy to indulge you. I will do anything you want”, Shisui smiled.

_Doesn’t matter how much I suffer, I will keep you happy._

“Anything I want? I have an idea.” Itachi's eyes became shiny.

Shisui was sensing some incoming dread.

“There is this horror movie I wanted to watch. But father won't let me do that because it’s rating is not appropriate for my age. Take me to watch the movie by lying to my parents. ” Itachi sounded extremely enthusiastic. 

Shisui declined, “No way, I’m not tainting your innocent eyes.”

“The rating is for the violence, nothing else. Take me to the movie Shisui. You promised to do anything.” Itachi complained. 

_I should not do it, but I don’t want to refuse him either. Why does he have to be so excited over some stupid movie? Wait, if I take him out to watch the movie, it will bring me closer to him. He will always like the idea of me sneaking him behind his parents' knowledge into a horror movie._

“How about this weekend? I will tell them you wanted to watch some movies for kids.”

Itachi was jumping from excitement, “You really can be nice when you want to. Thanks Shisui.” Itachi planted a small, innocent kiss on Shisui’s cheek, just like the old time.

Shisui’s efforts to get his emotions under control were thrown out of window.

_He kissed me! OH MY GOD, WHAT DO I DO? MY ITACHI JUST KISSED ME._

_What should be the normal course of action? Should I play cool? Should I place kisses on his cheeks too? Wait, I never kissed him on his cheeks before, I only placed kisses o the top of his head. Is it ok to do that now? I can pretend I don’t have ‘feelings’ for him. Then I can kiss him right? It’s getting so difficult to restrain myself._

Shisui started to run his thumb over Itachi’s jaw line and cheeks in a dazed state.

_How could I forgot, he loved to give away kisses and hugs freely. It was ok before, but now I want to pull him closer against me and kiss him._

_Now I want to kiss him until he becomes flustered. I want to know how he would react to my kisses. Would he have such innocent expression on his face? Or would he turn crimson from the embarrassment?_

Shisui closed the distance between them without even noticing what he was doing, but he was alarmed as soon as he discovered he was invading into Itachi’s personal space with the intention of kissing the shorter male.

_Shit, I need to take my leave right now, or else I will do something regrettable. Noo Shisui, stop thinking about it. Itachi is just a kid. He is nothing more. Nobody should ever know about what I felt for him yesterday, what I am feeling right now._

“I NEED TO GO”, Shisui screamed and sprinted out.

Itachi was dumbly standing in the garden.

_Why did he run away like that? Did I say something? He never hated the physical proximity. What happened?_

Confused Itachi did not know the strong struggle Shisui was doing to keep Itachi safe. Meanwhile Shisui was congratulating him for not jumping Itachi in his house.

_Great job Shisui, you were good at hiding your true feelings._

_Keep it up, I am so proud of you. You can do it, you definitely will be able to stay by his side without igniting any suspicions._


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our beloved boys go on a ‘not a date’ where Shisui encounters his first love rival.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It was fun to write the date between these two as it was not even an official date.

The weekend came rather quickly. Itachi’s parents agreed when Shisui requested to let Itachi join him for the weekend. He would never want to go to the details, but they had another very long talk with him. They never wanted to see Itachi hurt again.

“I still can’t trust you with our son. If you ever hurt him again, I will not hesitate to hurt you Shisui. You have done enough for one time”, Fugaku angrily said.

“It will never happen. I will never hurt him again. You have my words uncle”, Shisui replied politely. 

_I still need this man's blessings as I want Itachi, which I definitely will do in future._

Fugaku would have chewed him more if Mikoto did not intervene. 

“Shisui, Itachi is a very sensitive kid. Please be careful with him. I don’t understand why you are trying to make everything work after you were the one to sabotage it; but I understand this much, if the same thing happens again, I will simply kill you”, she threatened with a kind smile.

Shisui was always afraid of the mother Uchihas,“Never again. Please trust me on this.”

“Ok”, Mikoto agreed but Fugaku was reluctant. 

After Shisui left, he asked her, “Why did you agree?”

“Because the movie was Itachi’s idea. He told me he asked Shisui to take him out for a movie. I didn’t want him to get upset.”

“Hei I was wondering, did Itachi ever go to the movies with anyone other than us?”

Mikoto replied, “No.”

“Did Shisui even go to the movies?”

“No, as far I know, he doesn’t like them. Why do you ask? ”

“I have a bad feeling about it. I don’t like to leave Itachi at Shisui’s mercy.” Fuagku's father sensor was sending him some alarming signals but he failed to intercept them.

“We will have to keep close eyes on them.”

Shisui picked up Itachi and took him to the movie theater by car. They both were dressed casually. During the ride they slipped into comfortable discussion about their lives. Itachi talked about his brother Sasuke a lot. Shisui was glad to hear it because Sasuke was not a boyfriend. 

_It would have been difficult for me to deal with Itachi’s partners. Though I know that before I let Itachi know about my intentions, he might have other love interests. However, knowing a fact doesn’t make it easy to accept._

Shisui exchanged the anecdotes of his adventure from the USA with Itachi. He was still mesmerized by Shisui’s activities and he was happily laughing. When they reached the mall, Shisui got the ticket for the horror movie. 

“I will get the popcorn”, Itachi started to leave.

Shisui grabbed his hand, “Oi brat, It’s my treat.”

“You got the tickets though”, Itachi frowned.

_This brat is too cute for my fragile heart._

“You are not getting anything. I will buy the popcorn. Stay right here.” Shisui left to get some popcorn and Itachi was waiting for him. 

“Itachi kun”, someone called him from behind. 

Itachi spun around to notice a few of his classmates. The group had people whom Itachi liked and disliked. The group contained his friend Mitsu, who was well aware of the significance of Shisui in Itachi's life. Though he did not know in detail about Shisui's departure for the states. It also had Kyomi, who was considered to be the most beautiful girl of their class. However, she was a little bit annoying when she talked with Itachi.

“Itachi kun! You said you were busy on the weekend. We didn’t know that you will also come to the movies. You are here to watch the horror movie like us right?” Kyomi asked. She noticed the tickets on Itachi's hand and leaned in to check them, “Let me see. Wow, we are few rows behind you."

_Never have I ever prayed so earnestly for someone to suffer. I was having such a nice day, until she showed up._

She whined, " I wanna watch the movie with you Itachi kun.”

_Why do I hate to meet her right now?_

Itachi avoided her request and tried not to show his displeasure, “Hm, did you guys get popcorn? ”

“Yes we did”, Kyomi said enthusiastically and grabbed Itachi’s hand. “We can sit together throughout the movie. Mitsu will exchange his seat with you, right Mitsu?”

Itachi knew that she harboured romantic feelings for him, but he never felt like reciprocating. 

He tried to snatch his hand free as he did not like it when Kyomi was standing so close. However, he failed as the girl was shamelessly clinging to him.

“I can’t, I’m here with someone.” Itachi irritatedly replied.

Mitsu saw the irritation and decided to save Itachi from their classmate's whiny self, “With a girlfriend?”

Itachi replied, “No.”

_Shisui is not a girl. But now that I think about it, this does feel like a date. I asked him out, he picked me up._

“If it’s not a girlfriend, why don’t you join me Itachi kun? I get scared easily, so maybe you can comfort me throughout the movie?”

_Like hell I will. I am not going to miss my chance to spend some time with Shisui. I have 8 years worth of time to spend so that I can catch up._

"I can't."

The girl was clueless, "I'm sure your friend won't mind."

Itachi stared at her as if he wanted to strangle her.

_It doesn’t matter if my Shisui is ok with exchanging seats. I'M NOT FUCKING OK WITH HIM NOT BEING WITH ME._

_Since when Shisui became mine? I can deal with it later, first I will have to remove me from her clutch._

Itachi said, "He will mind because I was the one who invited him."

"Eh? But it will be fun Itachi kun if we watch it together." 

She was practically rubbing herself on Itachi's side. He was not throwing her off just because he was not trying to become angry when he had time to spend with Shisui. That was when Shisui came back. The first thing he noticed was some girl holding Itachi's arm and the said girl inviting Itachi to sit with her.

_Like hell he will bitch. I need to burn this girl. How dare she! She is touching my Itachi and blushing like a cheap whore. Let go of his hand before I can cut off your's. How dare she touch what is MINE?’_

Shisui approached from Itachi’s behind and put an arm around Itachi’s shoulder, “Itachi will have to decline, as he had promised to spend his whole weekend with me. So, Itachi can't join you."

He did not waste any time after the declaration and pulled Itachi toward him. His face was devoid of emotions but Itachi could swear he had seen red glints in Shisui's eyes. Itachi however, could not focus to confirm that fact as he was more aware of Shisui's presence around him. Shisui’s hard chest and abdomen was pushing directly into his back.

_Why does Shisui's display of protectiveness make me so happy?_

Poor Itachi did not know, it was not what he was thinking. It was Shisui's blatant possessiveness when he sensed that Kyomi was a rival. 

Shisui was throwing venomous glare at Kyomi while pressing Itachi tightly against him , "Another thing, Itachi becomes uncomfortable when someone tries to persuade him to do something he doesn’t want to do. Just like you were forcing him a few moments ago. He was just playing nice and wasn’t calling you out. But please refrain in future from pushing yourself on him. Itachi is too kind and doesn't deserve to deal with anyone's bullshit.”

_If you dare to touch my Itachi again. I will chew you up._

He then gave the group a polite smile and handed Itachi the bucket of popcorn. Itachi could not understand why Shisui's voice went so still.

_He never talks like that. What has gotten into him? He also said the whole weekend, but he only agreed to watch the movie. Does that mean I can spend more time with him?_

_Yessss._

Shisui tugged at him,“Let’s go Itachi.”

"Sorry guys, I really want to watch the movie with him."

_It’s more like I want to see his irritation. I can't help but wait for the moment when he will be extremely annoyed at the movie. He never liked to watch movies in general. However, he doesn’t need to know how hyped I'm to cause him irritation .Just like the old times._

Itachi then moved Shisui's arm from his shoulder and held it with his hand and nodded a nonverbal goodbye to his friends. 

_Take that bitch, Itachi wants to spend his time with me._

_Wait. A. Fucking. Minute._

_That girl is also a kid. Why do I have to get competitive with another child? Falling for someone does mess with common sense._

When they had taken their assigned seats inside the theater, Itachi said, “Thanks Shisui, for saving me from her clutch.”

With that, Itachi planted a small kiss on Shisui's cheek. The kiss lingered longer than Itachi had intended it to as he was distracted by the warmth of Shisui's cheeks.

_My Itachi is kissing me because I have saved him from that vulture. Good job Shisui. Wait, why is the kiss so prolonged? No, no, no, whatever you do, don't you dare to place chaste kisses on his face too. Shisui. Have. Some. Fucking. Control._

Itachi pulled out what seemed like after an ungodly amount of torturing moments. “I.. It’s n…ot um.. It's not a bi... Ug... Big deal Itachi. Anything for you.” Shisui felt heat crawling on the surface of his skin where Itachi kissed.

Itachi softly smiled at him, "I really don’t know how to deal with her when she tries to flirt with me."

_Nope, doesn't matter if she is a child too. I'm definitely killing her. I can permanently remove her from Itachi's side if he wishes. Nobody can prove anything._

_Actually Itachi doesn’t have to give verbal consent, I’m already in right to do anything I wish. She dared to try to take away my Itachi. The sole person I have fallen for, it is normal that she has to go._

_Wait Shisui, stop. Don’t plan murder for a 14 year old girl because she wanted to date Itachi. You have to make peace with the fact that Itachi might date someone who is not you. You will not make a move on him until he is legal. So, wait patiently until he becomes legal. You agreed to endure the torture. Don't fucking lose it now._

No matter how much rationally Shisui tried to explain it to his inner self, he failed. His newly discovered possessive self wanted to remove every single threat from Itachi's side and have the boy all to himself.

Itachi was wondering what made Shisui shutter but he decided to let it go as the movie was going to start. He got a text notification and wanted to check it. The text was from Mitsu.

>So, you do know that I’m ok with you dating a boy, Itachi? You can date anybody you want. <

>Shut up, it’s not a date.<

>Let me make it clear, your ‘not date' just wanted to kill Kyomi for getting too close to you just now? He was damn furious, dude. He snatched you away from Kyomi, like a hawk. Also, you kiss your ‘not dates'? Damn man. <

_What is Mitsu talking about? It’s true that Shisui had shown irritation toward Kyomi, but it has always been like that. Uchihas are always protective of their younglings. Shisui was just overprotective of him. Right?_

_And for the kisses, they were a habit of mine. I always had done it with Shisui, I could not change it overnight._

>Uchihas are like that, a bit overprotective. He was just trying to help me out.<

>He is an Uchiha too? It’s ok man, if you don’t wanna talk about it in detail. But if you want to deny it so bad, next time don’t hold his arm like that in public. Also, ignoring the kissing part? Nice avoiding. <

>Yes he is an Uchiha. You are reading too much into it. I'm not ignoring anything. Nothing needs to be explained. This is how I have always been around him. <

>What will your beloved Shisui say when he learns that you are on a date with another Uchiha? Won’t he be sad as his precious Itachi decided to replace him for another Uchiha?<

_Why the hell Shisui would say anything if I go on a date with anyone?_

Mitsu knew about Shisui a lot as Itachi kept talking about him. He only said things that Shisui had accomplished as a student. He would tell Mitsu that to inspire him to join Itachi as an accomplice when he was doing something questionable. Of course, the stories did not work like magic for Mitsu as it worked for Itachi. Mitsu mocked him several times saying Itachi sounds like a lovesick fan. Itachi could never deny it as he truly admired Shisui.

Mitsu also knew that most of the things Itachi did was because he was trained by Shisui in his early years. Itachi had a habit of saying, “Shisui would be so disappointed in me” whenever he messed up something. 

> Shut up. Why do you say like Shisui was my boyfriend? I don't even like Shisui in that way. <

>WTF dude? I always thought you were crushing hard on him. You always sound like a love sick puppy when you talk about him. I thought you weren’t saying anything about that because you weren’t ready to come out. Sorry, I misunderstood. However, Shisui will still be disappointed at you for lying so badly about your date. Ha ha ha.<

>I will kill you. Also, what are you talking about? I never sounded love sick.<

>No you won't kill me, you love me. I wish I have recorded your long monologues about Shisui. Then it would have been easier to explain what I meant by love sick.<

>Please shut up, Mitsu. The movie will start any moment now. <

>Talk to you later. Have a nice time with your 'not date.' <

_What is he talking about? Do I really sound like I'm in love with Shisui? Am I acting like his boyfriend today?_

_Shisui is not a date today, is he?_

_Do I want him to be a date? He won’t be a bad boyfriend I guess. He is handsome, kind toward people whom he cherishes, he really is awesome at everything._

_Wait a minute. Why do I feel like I am a Shoujo manga heroine who is describing her crush? Am I crushing on Shisui? When did that happen? It’s true that I always idolized him, but that was it. Did I always sound like this? Definitely no. I should ignore what Mitsu said. His words are just too stupid._

When the movie started, Itachi was trying to lean back in the seat but it was not comfortable at all. He tried to move a bit to find a more comfortable position but failed. After a while he felt a little bit sleepy as he did not get enough sleep the night before. He said, “Give me your shoulder Shisui.”

Shisui seemed a little surprised, “Why?”

“I want to rest my head.”

Shisui's eyes went wide. Itachi did not understand why he was having an urge to lay his head down on Shisui's shoulder. 

Shisui scooted closer and let Itachi do as he wanted. Itachi grabbed Shisui's arm and placed his head on Shisui's shoulder. After nudging his head for a while, he found his desired position and then he focused on the movie.

Meanwhile Shisui was having a nervous breakdown. He was hyper aware of Itachi’s subtle movements, his breathing, his small nudges around his shoulder. Shisui could feel everything Itachi was doing in his bones. He was questioning himself, why he agreed to Itachi's whim. 

_I just couldn't have declined him, could I? What was I even thinking? I know how bad my control is around him, I still dared to indulge him. Shisui, why are you so stupid?_

_Damn, I want to pull him up and make him settle down on my lap._

The idea of keeping Itachi on his lap while watching a movie was making Shisui flush from pleasure. The possessive urge to keep Itachi caged for hours on his lap was making Shisui euphoric. 

It was already difficult to control his feelings for Itachi. But with the time he was spending time with the younger male, Shisui found himself thinking more and more about the ‘not innocent’ things he wanted to do with Itachi.

_Damn it, since when my libido declared its presence because my partner decided to lean on my shoulder?_

Well, it was since he had fallen for Itachi. 

_Calm down, Shisui._

Itachi was rubbing his cheeks on Shisui's shoulder and then went back to watching the movie. 

_Does this brat know how difficult he is making it to maintain my control? I want to ruffle his hair, I want to plant kisses on the top of his head again, I want to kiss him square on his pulp lips._

_Shit,_

_Stop Shisui._

_Itachi is a kid._

_But it is ok to lay my head on top of his, right? Itachi won’t mind, right?_

After a few minutes Shisui carefully rested his head on Itachi’s not wanting to startle him. Itachi did not move. The smell of Itachi invaded his nostrils. Before he could stop him, Shisui took lungs full of Itachi's fragrance with a long inhale. 

_He won’t think it’s creepy , will he? He smells so nice, I want to do it again._

Somehow, a couple of more lung full Itachi's fragrance was able to calm Shisui down. Even though a scary movie was playing on the screen and most of the audiences were shouting because of the movie, Shiaui could only think about Itachi.The position was anything but comfortable. However, Shisui was lulled into sleep in that position.

Shisui opened his eyes because of a scared scream from the audience. He looked at his shoulder to find Itachi drooling on his shoulder.

_He has fallen asleep too. So much excitement to watch the forbidden horror movie, yet you are sleeping on my shoulder brat. We could have stayed home if I had known that this movie thing will turn into a sleeping session like this._

Shisui was having an inner battle.

_I should wake him up._

_No, don't wake him up. You won't have him so close to you anymore. You want to stay like this for as long as possible._

The movie ended and credits started to roll. Shisui waited to wake Itachi up until everyone had left the theater. 

“Itachi kun, Itachi. Wake up.”

Itachi started to wake up from his sleep mediated daze. 

He was adorably rubbing one of his eyes with his hand, "Shisui? What are you doing here?"

_The brat is still not awake and he looks so adorable._

"Playing as your pillow, brat." His voice was coated with all the affection he could muster.

Itachi immediately jolted up and became embarrassed when he realized he had been sleeping through the entire movie. 

“Shit, I'm so sorry Shisui. I was too excited about today and couldn’t get enough sleep yesterday because of that. I think I just fell asleep at the first moment I relaxed.”

 _Stop looking so cute Itachi._ _That makes two of us Itachi. I didn’t know how to take you out for movies without making it seem like a date. I was a panicky mess yesterday because of that. I guess we just became too cozy at each other's presence and we dozed off._

"It's ok, Itachi."

"It's not. I dragged you here, now I have fallen asleep. You had to endure the whole movie all by yourself. It was definitely horrible. "

_So, he didn't notice that I had fallen asleep too?_

Shisui started to rub his neck out of nervousness. 

_How do I tell him that I had fallen asleep on him because of how comfortable it was ?_

Shisui did not let Itachi know out of fear. Fear of Itachi realizing his unstoppable feelings for him. Fear that Itachi would leave when he knows the truth.

He thought about distracting Itachi. He decided that sharing his previous bad experiences would cheer Itachi up.

“Don't worry Itachi, I had worse experiences in the movies."

"Really?"

_You went to the movies? You don't even like them! You only used to watch them because I forced you to sit with me through them._

"Lisa once wanted to watch a romantic, cheesy film, which had a shitty plot. I had to sit straight through it for hours before-

“Lisa?” Itachi was trying his best to hide irritation.

_Who is she?_

Shisui apprehensively replied, “My girlfriend back in state.”

_Shit, I forgot about her existence since I got back! I will have to break things off with her as soon as I get back home._

Itachi simply replied in a cold voice, “Oh. Let’s go. The movie has ended after-all .” 

Shisui felt Itachi's sudden coldness, he felt Itachi's reluctance to hear the story. So, he decided not to pester. 

Itachi laced his hand with Shisui's, which made Shisui frantic. Itachi got his cell phone out and started to check it.

_I feel like I’m his boyfriend, ahhhhhnghshjdjdj. He is holding my hand._

_Red alert.._

_Red alert..._

_Itachi is holding my hand like it doesn’t matter, like it is natural for us to do it._

Shisui said in a controlled voice, “Ah, you are holding my hand.”

“I don’t want you to get lost”, Itachi's blunt reply.

Shisui panicked.

_Anghhh. What should I do? Should I hold his hand tightly? Maybe not too tight but softly enough to still keep the hold comfortable? Should I reverse our positions and lead the way? Or should I just let Itachi take me out of the theatre?_

Shisui was thinking too many matters at a time. However, he did not show his frantic state, “I'm not a kid Itachi, I won’t get lost.”

Itachi just ignored him and moved them out of the mall.

Itachi’s phone had one single text from Mitsu.

>Definitely not a date Itachi kun.<

Itachi replied once they were inside the car.

>Fuck off.<

>You kept your head on his shoulder for the whole time.<

>It's. Not. A. Date. Now stop messing with me. I had fallen asleep on his shoulder.<

>If it makes you feel better, your ‘not date' also leaned in to keep his head on the top of yours. Thought you will like to know as you were asleep.<

_Shisui had leaned in too? Why!! And why does it make me happy?_

_ > _ He is truly not a date.<

>The more you protest, the less believable your point sounds.<

>Shut up you ass.<

>Your Shisui will be disappointed by the way you have moved on from him. <

>I really wish to smash your head with a stone. Why would Shisui even care about my love life?<

>Ahh, don’t be so mean to me. He would care because you are always behaving like his fanboy.<

>Please shut up before I can strangle you. <

>BTW, what is the name of your ‘not date’?<

Itachi felt like he would be mocked by Mitsu, when he tells the name.

>Itachi kun?<

>I’m waiting.<

.

.

>Ooooi, are you gonna tell me?<

.

.

.

Itachi apprehensively typed,

>Uchiha.<

> Uchiha what?<

.

.

.

.

Itachi summoned his courage and texted:

>Uchiha Shisui.<

>😆😆😆😆😆😆 I knew it. Dude, you sure it's ok to deny the fact that you are in love with your Uchiha?<

Was he in love with Shisui?

No.

Does he want Shisui to be his love interest?

Itachi did not know the answer. Because he had never think about Shisui like that before today.

>I hate you from the deepest layer of my heart.<

Itachi decided to ignore Mitsu. During the car ride, he did not utter a single word. He was thinking about what Mitsu said and also about Lisa. He did not like the idea of Shisui dating someone else.

_What do I mean by someone else? Shisui is not dating me for the love of fuck. But if he does, it won't be that bad. Will it? Angggh, Mitsu's word has truly fucked my brain.  
_

Shisui had an uneasy feeling in his stomach but could not really put any finger on the reason behind it. He did not know it was his Uchiha sense detecting the terrifying awakening of a possessive Uchiha. He shuddered when he looked at Itachi's concentrated expression.

_What is going through that head of yours Itachi kun?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As usual, I request you to let me know your thoughts. Because they keep me motivate to write more words.


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